Indian men who have been forced to give up on marriage

The single Indian man speaks on many Indian men who have been forced to give up on their dreams of getting married and remain single and celibate for their entire lives.

Forced bachelorhood is now becoming a common thing amongst many single Indian men who are very well in their 30's and 40's. Unlike those single Indian men who have remain single out of choice, these men dream and seriously want to get married but are not able to find any suitable women for marriage.

Blame it on the skewed male female or high expectations of women, these men stand out to lose a lot.

A big percentage of these men belong to middle class and lower middle class families , some may belong to an upper middle class family but still they retain middle class values.

These men are average in their achievements and generally get by in life. They hold basic educational qualifications and have a junior or middle level jobs in organizations. Their salaries can have needs fulfilled but cannot but them luxuries.These men are not independent and stay with their parents.

Every matrimonial alliances they come across have high expectations in terms of salaries, designation, materialistic expectations which these men can't meet. Rejections and disappointments happen repeatedly. This trend continues even when they have crossed into their 30's.

I don't look down on these men. Not everyone is an IIT-IIM professional or a doctor or engineer. Some people are average and they do have the right to exist and make a living. However with the matrimonial markets filled with extremely high demands, expectations and groom comparisons, these men don't stand a chance. It is not that all women are out of their league, many women are of a similar class, unfortunately they want to get married on the next higher level of the financial pyramid. There are innumerable amount of these middle class Indian women who will prefer staying single rather than getting married to men of a similar class.

After constant rejections these men and their families give up on any hope of getting married and stoically accept a single life with a lot of disappointment and disgust. There will a generation of men who were born in their 70's, 80's and even 90's who will have to accept a single life with dejections and rejections.

This is a reality, since no one mentions about this in the mainstream media, I chose to do the same.There is nothing that I can do, however I will be writing two additional posts giving my advice to these single Indian men and their parents and how they need to move and accept this single life.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day and I promise to be back with a lot more.

BHAVEEN SHETH-INDIAN MGTOW

How these feminist statements have ruined the lives of tens and thousands of Indian women-BHAVEEN SHETH DOTSIM-INDIAN MGTOW

Bhaveen Sheth the writer of this blog writes a post on one of the brainwashing techniques used by feminists and feminazis in India through affirmations and statements on single urban Indian women. These statements have had terrible consequences on the lives of tens and thousands of Indian women leaving them single into their 30's and 40's:

"Koi accha ladka to milna chaihye" (I should be able to find the right guy), I will settle down only when I find the right person, I am still to come across with my Mr.Perfect.  These are nothing but feminist statements made to India's women in order to force them to keep finding the right guy (who does not exist) and keep on rejecting every decent man they come across.

What has this lead to? Well, it has lead to tens and thousands of Indian women being single now in their 30's and 40's with limited chances of finding a soul mate. They are now branded as left over women who hardly have any takers. Telling the truth, Indian women are not strong enough to live a single independent life on their own, of course there are exceptions but then I would go with the law of the majority. On one side you are made to grow up with the fact that you will get married, have a loving husband, lovely children, a family and happy family life and on the other side you are not able to get married because of the thinking you have picked up from these feminist statements. This leads to women who have a conflict within themselves. This makes them very toxic.

I am not a misogynist or a patriarch but if I have to put the general opinion of the Indian society, I state that the single Indian woman has marital value till she is 30, after that she is  considered as an off the shelf product. Marital prospects decline after she crosses 30.Feminist statements make these women think that they are god's own creation and they are entitled to have the best man but in reality a majority of these women have their own fundamental flaws and shortcomings that they tend to overlook. In the process of rejecting men and marital prospects that come along, these women cross their marriageable ages. And now they are well into their 30's and 40's , living a single life filled with unhappiness, despair and gloom resigned to a life of loneliness. They fail to realize that if they had kept moderate expectations, things would have worked our and by now they would have been happily settled down.

This is the bitter truth about feminism and women's liberation. This has ruined the lives of tens and thousand of single Indian women living urban cities of India.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day and promise to be back with a lot more.

Bhaveen Sheth-INDIAN MGTOW

Words of wisdom to all single Indian male IT Professionals from Qoura-BHAVEEN SHETH-INDIAN MGTOW

The single Indian male was browsing through some popular write-ups on quora.He cam across an interesting write up on advice to a single Indian male IT professionals on what they need to do in order to improve their personalities and become better human beings. Please find the tips written below:

Mostly for Male Software Engineers.

1. The girl who comes to your seat with twinkle in her eyes is not interested in you. She wants to get the fucking work done. And she will not date for your favour. She thinks you're a wussy. 
2. Most of you my friends including me have a rubbish and sloppy communication and weirdo accent. Get some training dude.
3. Your dressing sense sucks. Date a fashion designer if it is all possible for you. Date? Yes. Don't wear formal pants with sneakers or sports shoes. It's not cool.
4. Take care of personal hygiene. No wonder girls run away from you. Use some good perfume and make sure you eat mint after consuming tons of onion during lunch or after smoking.
5. Make sure your tummy doesn't entice me to say that you're pregnant without delivery(PWD). Take care of your health my friend. It's important.
6. Become interesting. Get a life outside GOT, LOTR, and many more. Read something about evolution. Read books by Matt Ridley, Robert Greene and Neil Strauss.
7. If you think the girl you discreetly look over your desktop doesn't notice you then I am telling you that she knows. She thinks you're a pervert. If you like her go and tell her. She thinks you lack balls to ask her out.
8. Those with 1% lucky smart genes and good built but bad accent and poor self image, if you think girls in India will drool over you because it happens in some deodorant advertisements, then arse off. It's India. No one will come to you and that's why that talkative, confident, ugly and smart ass friend of yours is sleeping with all the girls. You need to talk to her buddy to create some interest.
9. The Pizza you're eating during unsolicited late stays at your office is the biggest cause of your growing waistline. Cut the crap and carb. You're acting like a greedy pig here.
10. Cut down your time in front of idiot box and laptops and start going to gym for god sake. Learn some moves so that you don't embarrass yourself in the upcoming annual party dance. Your weird dance has already repelled so many girls from you. Specially the snake dance of yours.

I hope my readers especially the single Indian men from the IT sector will follow and implement the points mentioned above.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day and promise to be back with a lot more.

BHAVEEN SHETH

Confessions of an Emotionally abused Indian Husband-Bhaveen Sheth DOTSIM

Bhaveen Sheth the writer of this blog "The Diary of a Single Indian male" shares a post from Quora on the condition of an emotionally abused married Indian man. Please read the post below:

I am 26 years old and I just got married to the girl I loved. Eight months into the marriage, I am depressed and on the verge of doing something disastrous but completely silent.

My wife has been an extremely spoilt child even by her own declarations. Every month, she spends a large chunk of the salary on stuff that we eventually throw out in a week or two. If I protest, she threatens to leave me or tells me that I am not a man for not being able to provide ‘basic’ amenities to her. Basic here includes dresses of brands I can’t pronounce and gift items and decorative stuff that we have little place in the house to keep.

I earn decently or that’s what I thought. Every single day, she asks me to do better at my job and earn more money. If I don’t earn more money, then what sort of a man am I? This is what she believes. She texts me constantly when I am working and asks me to come back home as early as possible. That affects work and in turn, the money. But if I have to stay back for longer hours and work harder, we get into fights that last for days. She threatens to kill herself.

She keeps posting feminism based messages on Facebook and is an avowed believer of equality. At home, she tells me that I should take care of the house and see how tough that is. Which is what I have been doing for three months now. I also do all her work at her workplace (she works in accounts and I find the time to do her balance sheets every day). She proudly proclaims to her friends that she works and takes care of the house all by herself, but I know better.

Since my mother is a heart-patient (my father passed away seven years ago), she has told me that ending this marriage will be her end. I must continue.

Every single day, we discuss about where she should go and shop, what she should wear, where I must take her to lighten her mood since the household work makes her miserable. If I express one opinion about where we should eat or what we should do, she tells me please think about me too. It’s not about you all the time. If I tell her that can I bring my mother to take care of her at least for a few days, she tells me ‘I don’t have time for useless people.’ Her family comes over and stays for days on end (which is a decent expense for me that makes things worse later on). If I protest, the threat is there and my mom is told about her son’s incapability. She believes it and reprimands me and asks me to work on myself.

I have stopped protesting, stopped speaking, stopped thinking. If I think and my face twitches, she tells me, ‘what was that? Why did you look at me like that? Are you doing me a favour by being nice to me? Do you know I could have married anybody…’ I sleep after her and wake up before her to prepare her first cup of coffee. I cook on most days since the last three months. ‘I will cook when I feel like. My father has always kept me like a queen. It’s time you did that too.’ I work constantly and barely get time to do anything else. At night, she tells me, ‘I think you are failing as a husband. I think you don’t realize how lucky you are. I hope you grow up and start valuing me.’ This is not a recent happening. I am writing about eight odd months here.

So what sucks about being a man? I cannot express my anger in this situation without being called a wuss. I tried exploring some legal options to end this charade but it won’t end well for me and with my mom undergoing her treatment, I won’t be able to afford it. I have told by my wife that I harass her or that I am like other men that rape women, if I don’t reach home within the time she specifies. She constantly complains about me to her friends, about how much of an idiot I am. She also discusses my sexuality with her friends and proudly tells me about it. Imagine if I did stuff like that? Yet, all that talk passes off as allowable coffee conversation. I can never claim that I cooked something or kept the house clean. No extra points for managing work and the house. But for her, that’s very commendable as she is a woman and has to battle inequality every day. For me, all this stuff must be easy as I am privileged.

I know feminism is a good thing and it is important to win the war for equal rights for women. It is very much the need of the hour. But my battle is lost. I will always smile and pretend things are ok, while I am dying inside.

This is the reality of many married Indian men, however a majority chose to suffer silently throughout their lives. I really feel sad about this person but there is nothing  that I can do. An important lesson learnt from this post is that before marriage every Indian man should thoroughly scrutinize the girl and put his expectations clearly before proceeding for matrimony.Should you ever encounter an over pampered spoilt princess in a prospective then drop it, just drop it from the start, you don't want end up with the life that this married man has shared above.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day and promise to be back with a lot more.

Kyaa Kar Sakti Hai Police? Bhaveen Sheth DOTSIM

In this short post, the single Indian man would like to share a popular video on you tube of a scene form the  Bollywood movie "GUDDU RANGEELA".

In this video, a police man on an inspector level is threatening suspected robbers on what the police can do against anyone. Have a look below:

In a brilliant acting done by Amit Sial, he shows the reality of the Indian police.All Indian men should watch this video and think, how biased and prejudiced the policing system in India really is.

We have often seen women complaining at police stations and falsely accusing their husbands and in-laws. In order to make a quick buck or being influenced by the woman and her family, the police books the man and his family in all sorts of false cases like 498a, domestic violence, harassment and a lot more.

This is a reality that all Single Indian men must know especially those who are planning to get married.

This post was just to create and awareness amongst all Single Indian men and they need to be aware of this in their daily dealings with women.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day and promise to be back with a lot more.

BHAVEEN SHETH

THEY WILL ALL VISIT YOUR PROFILE BUT NONE WILL SHOW ANY INTEREST- BHAVEEN SHETH DOTSIM

In this short blog post I write down certain trends that I have observed on the online matrimonial platforms.

In January this year , quite reluctantly I once again registered myself on a matrimonial site. Yaaa!!! You guessed right, shaadi.com!!!It was done just to show the world that people like me do exist (especially when women complain that there are no good men left in India.)

After my registration some interests did come but nothing proceeded further and now I hardly get any expression of interests.I am not bothered because I know better. But recently I have observed that my profile views have drastically increased. Many potential matches have visited my profile, some have done it repeatedly but there has been no expression of interest.

My profile pictures, education and profession may make me a potential suitor but because of a zero family background I hardly stand a chance. On my profile I have been extremely transparent about myself stating each and every aspect of my life and accordingly I have written the content under the heading "ABOUT MYSELF". But somewhere I feel that it the truth that is repelling them. After all who would want to associate with a n orphan ? Who would want to marry his daughter/sister to marry a person who has no family? I am looked upon with suspicion. Yes sir, this is the harsh reality of being an orphan in India.People may sympathize with you but none will empathize. Didn't a wise man say that marriage is a union between two families and not 2 individuals.

At-least I now have an answer if someone were to ask me why online matrimonial sites never worked in my favour? It is written in this post of mine.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day and promise to be back with a lot more.

BHAVEEN SHETH

Indian society is equally intolerant of free spirited single Indian men-Bhaveen Sheth DOTSIM

Sometime back , I read an article which spoke on an extreme level of intolerance of the Indian society towards free spirited single Indian women.However it failed to mention on an equal level or even more intolerance directed towards free spirited single Indian men.

Our society has never accepted the so called single status of people and has always detested people who have chosen to live a single life.While single Indian women are detested for not getting married and giving birth to a child, single Indian men are hated for not getting married, settling down and living a decent family life. Single Indian men are often accused of being vagabounds.

Indian society is made up of various likes and dislikes, at times it contradicts its very own structure,foundation and values.

Tolerance towards single Indian men especially those who are free spirited and live a happy life is extremely limited. In India, you won't find men who are single, somehow they get married, those who are not married are in the process of being hitched. I can't vouch the same for the single Indian women. Men who stay single out of their own choice face  lots of criticism and taunts.The society blacklists and debars them.Limited people will associate with them, their very existence is a source of criticism.

Single free spirited men are seen as a threat to the normal order of the Indian society.Since childhood we have been indoctrinated into following the routine protocol of life, you know, getting a good education, getting a job, getting married, settling down and having children.So what happens when some Indian men stay single out of their own choice and challenge this society order?They are certainly bound to become a source of envy and hatred.

It takes a lot of strength, courage and resilience for  Indian men to remain single.The decision to stay single is itself a difficult one to make.Once you start enjoying your own company and start living your life, you draw the attention of other people, free spirited single Indian men can do a lot of things that their married counterparts cannot.With no responsibilities over us , we are eagles soaring high in the skies.By staying single we disturb the natural order of the society hence we are disliked, we are branded irresponsible as we don not undertake the responsibilities of a family and fatherhood.No one is willing to accept the fact that we are pursuing our own interest at the cost of sacrificing our married life.

Our lifestyle is a big question mark for many. Most people think that we boose, take drugs, watch pronograpic movies,womanize and live a shabby life, that is certainly not the case. Now we cannot go around justifying our existence, can we? Remaining single allows us to pursue the activities of our own interests, we are more content with our lives compared to our married peers.Many single Indian men take a step further to take good care of themselves, age gracefully, become voracious readers and wonderful conversationalists.These men shine out, so they get hated, single men also do not have the financial woes that married folks have, no home loans, no car loans, no school and college fees to pay. Thirties and forties are a bliss for the single Indian men. So now tell me , why won't the single guys be hated.

Indian society will always remain intolerant, it does not accept the minority or diverse people.We often see its hatred directed towards its religious minorities , low castes, dark skinned people, north east Indians, the LTGB community , widows, divorcees and singles. Ohhh and not to forget the hatred towards the non-vegetarian eaters and those who exercise their freedom of speech.

We the single Indian men are free spirited souls, we have chosen this life, we don't need confirmation from idiotic and stupid married Indian men who claim to be representing the society, we don't need any advice and we don't want help.If the society hates, so be it. Who and what is the Indian society? It is made up of four people who will always have something critical to say no matter what you do.

The society is never going to accept us as we have violated its norms, rules and laws and we don't need its acceptance either.Our married peers will always have something to say. What you will eventually carry to your death bed are memories and experiences, do your best to make them look good.Looking back it is these memories that will bring a smile on your face. So go ahead and life your free spirited life without bothering about others.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day and promise to be back with a lot more.

BHAVEEN SHETH