Bhaveen Sheth-DOTSIM- An Open letter to my Readers and crtitics alike.

DOTSIM stands for the diary of the Single Indian Male.

I start my blogpost by wishing everyone a very happy diwali and greetings of the season.

Over the past few months my blog posts have been read and  appreciated by some readers while some of them criticized my writings stating that they found it sarcastic, anti-women, patriarchal, sexist and  to an extent t that I, the writer seems to be sexually frustrated,  on a look out for women to sleep with.

First of all i would like to clarify that my blog is intended for the so called species of the single Indian men, something that used to be rare in our Indian Society is now gradually rising in numbers, thankfully more and more men have taken the decision to be single and when i say single Indian men , i refer to the Urban, educated, upwardly mobile, middle and upper middle class men, men who are professionals, well educated and hold respectable jobs. It is certainly not aimed at the average frustrated Indian male who happens to be single because he is an incompetent person, a man who has failed both on the personal and professional fronts, having no other option but to stay single and not to forget men who belong to regions and communities of India where female foeticide and infanticide is a common practice.

My posting  here describes the feelings of the Single Indian men, the advantages of being single, the problems and challenges faced by us in an increasingly intolerant and prejudiced society, on ways to improve the quality of our lives and a lot more.

There are many websites and blogs for the single Indian Women, but there are hardly any for us. If you want to verify , please google blogs on the Single Indian Male, chances are you will find limited sites.I am trying to create a forum where single Indian Males can meet, read, share and discuss on common issues.

And no, this blog was, is and will never be anti-women, patriarchal, misogynist or sexist in nature. It is sad to see that the Digital Indian Media is filled with all kinds of anti Indian man write ups, from being labelled as a rapist to a pedophile, from being called a mama's boy to a pathetic and a worthless husband and what not, but still we the Indian men neither protest nor do we find it inflammatory. But if we write something and something that is really truthful about the Indian Women within the backdrop of the Indian Society,  readers find it offensive. OHHHH C'mon grow up, learn to accept life with a pinch of salt. And please tell me??Are all the women we come across in our society or country SATI SAVITRI'S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, i mean really!!!! , is that the real scenario, i completely disagree.

And Sex, what is wrong if some of my write ups are on this Topic.Why is such an important need to tabooed in our society??? Do the Single Indian Women only have the right to discuss this topic on online forums????Is it a copy right of the female fraternity??? If we Indian Men write on our sexual desires on an online forum, we are labelled as perverts, sexual maniacs, frustrated dogs with a raging libido.!!!!!!!! Oh Yaaa!!!! So , my dear Indian Women , with whom are you going to have sex with , some Pakistani or Afghan across the border or some African who is our country on a student visa ( and well drug trade). Grow up, women , grow up. I am not giving advices to anyone on molesting and raping an innocent female. I am just sharing my opinions and thought processes with like minded single Indian Men. And please don't tell me that you don't like sex!!!!!!!!! Stop being a bloody hypocrite!!!!!

My blog wants to bring out some harsh realities about the Indian Society to all my online readers, realities which we have often denied, realities that we  accepted, tolerated and kept quiet, realities that have  ruined the lives if some of us, realities that give us hope in a society filled with gloom and despair.

I will continue to blog and share my thoughts, whether you like it or not, whether you appreciate it or not.

Tips on Watching a Movie in a Multiplex Alone, all by yourself

DOTSIM stands for the Diary of the Single Indian Male.

Hello Friends,

Wish you all a very Happy Janmashathami!!!!!!!!! (Please Excuse the Spelling)

We all , as the Single Indian Males love to watch movies ( at least 90 percent of the guys reading this post)

And what would it take to watch your favourite movies that have  been released recently in  Multiplexes over the city.

                           

But then there comes a problem, and what would that be?????? Hmmmm, how to watch a movie alone.

After all we live in the Bloody Indian Society , well know for its discrimination towards the Single people.

But don't worry my friends, there is plenty of advice here on how to go about it.

First, just don't worry, pick your wallet, walk in to a multiplex, buy a ticket and watch the show.Initially it may be difficult but then you will get used to it,life is all about experimenting and experiencing.

Please do not depend on someone to accompany you. You are single so learn to enjoy your single life, there is no point in feeling insecure or guilty watching a movie all by yourself in a Multiplex, after all you go to shit in the washroom  alone , you don't take anyone along with you, Do you?????

Avoid the first day first show, that also the nights and the late nights, you will find the multiplex jam packed, the ticket rates raised to a higher level and of course the crowd will consist of the families and the extended families, who will end of talking  non stop throughout the movie, thus murdering your entertainment.Also try to avoid night and late night shows on weekends for the obvious reasons.

The best times to watch a movie in a multiplex for a Single Indian Male is on Weekdays, Morning and afternoon shows and Morning shows on Saturday and Sunday Mornings. Reasons , well , cheaper costs, less crowd, and good entertainment.

Take a half day leave  from your work and watch the movie, get up early on a Sunday and rush to the nearest multiplex to catch up with the Morning show, you will hardly find any families and will be able to watch the movie peacefully.

Eat something before you go to the multiplex, don't spend money on buying the snacks from inside when you know that you can buy the same thing outside at 1/10th the price. Alternatively after watching the movie, go and find some good eatery outside and fill your stomach.

Decide on what kind of movie you want to watch in a Multiplex, don't waste your hard earned money watching gibberish bollywood movies which you can easily download on your system through torrent. Also find out the multiplexes which screen award winning special movies which are often not watched by the general population.

Dress and groom up properly before going to watch a movie, just don't wear anything and end up looking like a slob. After all, the man who goes to watch a movie alone should look impressive. Carry something to pass your time in the waiting lounge while waiting for the movie to start . I mostly carry a book or a magazine. You can also get busy with your cell phone and browse the internet or play a game on your phone. Just be engaged, you should not feel depresses that everyone is a couple or a crowd and you are the only Mr.Single.

Do find the show timings and if you realize that the multiplex is screening two of your favorite movies, you may watch the movies back to back.

So be confident, be happy, take your chance and watch the movie all alone by yourself, because the Single Indian Male in India has every right to live and enjoy his life.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day, will be back with a lot more

Bhaveen Sheth-DOTSIM-Life Post 30

DOTSIM- Diary of the Single Indian Male.

My Dear Single Indian male Friends,

Hope this blog finds you in good shape.

Today i will deal with the topic of life after 30 for the Single Indian Male. YEaaaaa, i certainly have to discuss this fact of life ,  i am aging and that cannot be denied. Life can certainly take a different turn.

Life post 30 is different, unlike woman i don't have the frustration of being left out or not being part of the married group. I have never been made to feel a part of the Indian Society ever since i became an orphan.

I concentrate whole hardheartedly on my career, because this is what i feel will give me satisfaction and take me ahead. I search for advance management diploma programs/ certification programs  to enhance my career skills. i have dreams , dreams of rising on top, of working with people  developing and shaping their careers.

Marriage???? That's a big question mark, i have no answer and i can't predict the future. As an orphan i find no acceptance in the Indian Society, but who cares. I still have kept an option open in my life , one may never know what happens in life.

Books, books and more books. They have now become my friends and my fellow companions. I just love reading them to the end, it opens my mind, engages me and calms me down. Reading as a hobby has never been developed  in India, no wonder a lot of people don't know what to do when they find themselves alone and lonely.

Fitness!!!!!!!!!!!!, this year starting 2013, i became a marathon freak, ran 3 marathons and got  addicted to it. I saw my self loosing weight and seeing my waist trimming gradually, there is now other feeling than aging gracefully.

At the end what do i have to say??? All i can say is that live your life dude, don't be worried just because you are single. Life certainly starts post 30 , provided you are willing to make radical changes in your life.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day, will be back with some more.

Bhaveen Sheth

Bhaveen Sheth-DOTSIM-Living Single and Being Happy

Bhaveen Sheth- Self Made Man in just a Bullshit Word in the Indian Society

SELF MADE MAN

The world loves to admire self made men. Best selling books are authored on this Topic. Numerous documentaries are made on renowned self made men.

Recently in many matrimonial profiles that I come across, i had seen the bride's parents looking for a self made man for their daughter.

Diary of a Single Indian Male-We are the Chosen ones

My Dear Single Indian Men,

All my brothers who are single for whatever reasons, please don't get depressed. Let me tell you that taking a decision to be single is not easy , especially for men. It takes a lot of courage and guts to stay alone.

And guess what!!!! all you single men out there have the courage to stay alone. Please don't be disheartened, remember we are the chosen ones, chosen by god to stay alone and be happy. There is something productive that we single men are going to contribute to the society and to the world.

So enjoy this single life and remain happy.

This is Bhaveen Shetn signing off for the day, will be back with some more.

Regards,

Bhaveen Sheth

Bhaveen Sheth-Confessions of an Intellectual Arrogant Male

Yes I am arrogant, so what??

I am arrogant because i am a subject matter expert.

I am arrogant because I keep myself updated with the latest developments happening in my field.

I am arrogant because i value my self respect and my personal dignity.

I approach people with a so called "down to earth nature" only to be rebuked, insulted and humiliated so now i take the arrogant stance.

I approach incompetent and insecure people, so insecure that they will do anything do defend their position. Mediocrity has become the norm in all industries in this country.

I ask a little bit of help and support from you and you treat me like a class 4 category staff and then you call me arrogant.

Why don't you admit that you get inferiority complex when you meet intellectual and competent people????

I am arrogant and I will remain arrogant and you know what?? I give a shit about it. I am thick skinned and can take such form of criticism, because i know that my work will prove my worth.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day, will get back with more.

Bhaveen Sheth

Bhaveen Sheth Confessions of an Orphan

Being an Orphan in India is difficult. A lot of people think that orphans are like Huckleberry fins or Oliver twists, worst , people have an image of an orphan right from the 70's and the 80's Bollywood movie, that of a child wearing a  torn banyan and shorts wit a bowl in his hand begging for Alms. They can't imagine an Orphan having a good corporate job.

Anyways let’s leave the Historical facts  behind, but as an orphan I often have to  lie about my real identity, when asked about my family background, i just say that they are in their Home town living a retired life. This one statement shuts the mouths of a lot of people.

Bhaveen Sheth-Diary of Single Indian Male-The Basics

Dear All,

Greetings for the Day!!!!

This post is mainly to target the Single Indian Male. He can be a single orphan (like me), divorced/widowed or a man coming from a dysfunctional family who has decided to stay single all his life.

When I searched for any information relating to the Single Indian Male on Google, I did not find anything relevant, I did find the Diary of the Single Indian Girl, but nothing on a Man.

My writings here are to give advice to all Single Men Living in the Indian Setup across different Cities and Towns of India. Class/Caste, social and financial status does not matter. The idea here is to share one’s feelings and exchange ideas on how one can survive living as a single man.

Being an Orphan post 30

Crossing 30 I still have the status of being an Orphan.................................... being unattached, destitute , Homeless, i ask myself where my life is heading to on the personal front.

No one , no one puts his/her hand on me to give the feeling of being a Human being, no one wants to associate with me on a long term basis. Festivals that come up and make no importance to me, i have no one to call and no one is there to call me.

I am going to stay as I am, the Indian society will never do any favour on me by removing the tag of being an Orphan on my head, but i intend to change the situation for myself.

I don't want to be dependent on someone when i grow old and for that I intend to make myself fit so that i can age gracefully and i don't intend to be homeless, i shall work for to get a decent home for myself so that i always have a home to back to.

And this will be an achievement for me an orphan........................................................................................

Bhaveen Sheth-Some Random Thoughts Part 16

I get on to a regular life and start adjusting day by day.

Getting back and starting afresh is not easy but I am happy , the break of some months was really good.

I come across some Ego maniacal People who will themselves not do  anything and wont allow others to do.They have just wasted years of their lives doing nothing and have never developed at all professionally, personally or spiritually.

Why is it that such Old Insecure people feel threatened by the Youngsters who are Hardworking, talented and brilliant?????

Bhaveen Sheth-To become as an Inspiration to others Inspite of Being an Orphan

As I have written before, being an Orphan is not an easy thing, but I take up the challenge to live my life and make it an example to others, an inspiration to others to set an example that no matter how many difficulties one faces in life, no matter how many adversities that come by one should not loose any hope and keep on fighting.

There are many things that I would like to accomplish to set an example.Some of my major objectives are as follows.

An Accomplished Career Professional

No other accomplishment can be parallel to Professional and Academic Achievement. The respect that one gets by having good educational credentials and a Professional Growth. It will be an example to everyone that people who have no one to take care of them can rise high in the Society.

I await that Moment when people will look up to me with pride and say that I am indeed a self made man who came up with Sheer Hardwork.

A Home of My Own

Yes, I am an Orphan but along with that I am also a Homeless Destitute.For the last 12 years I am in search of a permanent Home. A place which I can call my own home, a place which can give me peace and solitude, a place that will give me a sense of security. It does not have to be a villa and nor should by home be in located in a Metro City.

I go more for simple but beautiful interiors, a home filled with almost all the facilities. A place where i need not stay by the rules of the Owner or the care taker because in this case I myself will be the care taker.

Those four walls and the roof will give me a real sense of security and  remind me that even in the worst possible circumstances I have my own home to go back to.

If life goes as per what I plan and If I remain single a home on the the Konkan Coast is on my list and one day Hopefully with the grace of God, I will be the owner of a small house.

Endless Travel All over India

We Live in India and eventually die in India never having visited even a place other than our place of birth and place of work. There is so much to explore in India, from the Secluded Hills of Ladak and Leh and the Coastal Areas of  Kerala, from the Deserts in Gujarat and Rajasthan to the Jungles and Hills of North East India.

This desire is there in me to become an avid traveler and see all the places and tick place on the Map of India showing the places that I visited. Journeys will add to my wisdom and widen my Horizons. There is so much that life has in store for me.

Teaching the Underprivileged

Every has a his/her own way to give something  back to the society some do charity , some do philanthropy, some do social work and some actively involve themselves in helping the needy.

I have a dream to teach the underprivileged children, to empower them with education because education will become their tool for the future.

All over India there is shortage of good teachers, teacher who have good skills, teachers who can teach important subjects like Maths, Science and English. And when  it comes to English who does not want to learn it, who does not dream of speaking this fluent language that the British gave us in their Legacy.

With my Skills in Training and Development I will empower the underprivileged and make them learn and master this language.

There will be no other satisfaction than seen them succeed in their lives and when they will look behind and express their gratitude and give me their blessings. This is what I intent to do and it will be my way in giving back to the Society.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing of for the day will be back with more.

Bhaveen Sheth