The rise in the population of India's ineligible bachelors and leftover men

While our society has shown a growing concern on Indian women not getting married after a certain age and more and more women remaining single, no one has tried to shed  light on the sudden and steep rise in the numbers of ineligible unmarried Indian men or better known as leftover men/bare branches.

These are men who have failed to get married for reasons obviously known to them, Demographically these men are found in huge numbers in the Northern part of India where decades of selective sex determination tests have led to female infanticide and abortions. Now these regions are facing a grave shortage of women.This is just one reason why we see so many unmarried Indian men.The other reason is the high standards, expectations and demands of Indian women when it comes to marriage.Time and again I have stated that Indian women marry higher up in the socio economic ladder. They prefer men who have better jobs earning a good salary package.Some men have not been as successful on the job and career front, some men are stuck in a dead end job with no further growth. These are the men who get rejected in the matrimonial market.

And then there are men belonging to a second category. These men hold good jobs and earn a decent salary. Unfortunately they come with their own fundamental flaws or personal in-competencies. These are men who are physically abnormal (too dark, short, obsese, short and scrawny), men who have poor social skills, they can't initiate a conversation with an unknown woman, men who lack self-esteem and self confidence which is noticeable from the body language.

So here you have a rising population of ineligible single Indian men, something that the Indian government should notice.This population is made up of disheartened and depressed men.Some of these men have hateful feelings towards the married Indian population.Being a left over Indian man deals a big blow one's ego especially for the men from North India.I also want to mention that these men are prone to indulge in bad habits like alcohol, drugs and women.Those days are not far when i will see these Indian men wasting their lives and careers because of their addiction to such vices.

Indian men have never been conditioned to live a solo life. They can"t accept the fact that they have to move on and go solo even after countless rejections from prospective brides.Indian society has indoctrinated its men in the philosophy that marriage is the be all and end all of life.Men are not able to come in terms with their solo status.

India and Indian society needs to make efforts in order to accommodate this population of ineligible bachelors.For starters the Indian society should stop taunting and making fun of  these single Indian men. There is no point in making fun of a person who is not married just because you are happily married and have a family does not mean that everyone should follow the bandwagon. People should learn to practice empathy towards single Indian men.Single Indian men are human beings. Stop treating them as some kind of an infected animal who needs to be quarantined. Learn to accommodate them on the social front. Let them live their lives the way they want.

The government also needs to pitch in be giving support to these men.Start helplines/hire counselors to deal with the problems of single men.Give incentives to builders to make studio apartments.

Concluding this post I state that in the coming years the population os single Indian men will rise and efforts need to be put in to accommodate them.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day and promise to be back with a lot more.

The Indian Society will never understand the MGTOW Lifestyle-Bhaveen Sheth DOTSIM-INDIAN MGTOW

The above picture sums it all. Men Going Their Own Way is a  movement that originated in the West to counter the toxic effects of militant feminism. This movement has spread across the world and is now gaining popularity in India.

Known as the Indian Men Going Their Own Way, this movement has gained prominence since the year 2014. You have channels of you tube, pages on Facebook and posts on quora highlighting this movement. In a span of five years, this movement has gained a huge fan following and more youngsters are joining the MGTOW clan.

MGTOW is different from those Men's Right Activists movement that is made up of all divorced and separated Indian men and their families or men who are fighting difficult divorce cases in courts.

MGTOWs have realized the dark reality of the Indian marriage system and have walked away from it adopting a different lifestyle.

However our great Indian society will never understand the Indian MGTOW lifestyle. The MGTOW followers should not care at the criticism they face.

Indian men are reduced to nothing but providers, ATM Machines and EMI/Home Loan Payers. We as Indian men are commodified based on our education ,job, salary and house ownership. Indian men are forced to follow the norms of the society without asking any questions. They have to get married, have a child and start playing the role of husband and a father at a particular age and the cycle of life goes on.

Now what if a man chooses to break these societal norms. What if he decides not to get married and live his life independently? You all know. All hell breaks loose!

Firstly it is the parents and the relatives who will never accept the idea of a man choosing not to get married and living his life the way he wants. In India, men are expected to blindly follow the traditions of the society. Any form of deviance in not tolerated. Plus there are parents who want to see his son get married and have his own children. Only in India marriage and having children is the proof to certify that a man  is stable and potent (I hope you understand what I mean)

We also have a crab mentality in India. If someone is doing a good thing, there are 99 people out there to stop him from doing it. Married Indian men are jealous of MGTOWs for all the reason they can be. It is not easy to see a single Indian man living his life, enjoying all the good things, travelling across to different places and having no tension of home loans and EMI's. The married Indian man is stuck with home chores, babysitting and living a life he detests. Many married Indian men are stuck in dysfunctional marriages with spouses they love to hate. They are still in the marriage just for the sake of their children, parents and the society pressure.

Acceptance of MGTOWs will not be easy, Metro cities in India are becoming good places for MGTOWs to have a decent lifestyle but still there is criticism. Tier 2 and Tier 3 cities are stuck in the conservative rut. An unmarried Indian man beyond a certain age is unacceptable. People are bothered about others and their lifestyle.

Living for yourself is still considered selfish in India. People fail to understand that there is a difference in being selfish and self centered. If a man lives for himself and enjoys his own company, he is considered to be an outcast. 

As a veteran Indian MGTOW now at the age of 36, I believe that we don't owe anyone an explanation. Our society is currently witnessing extremes of toxic feminism and hyper gamy. No matter how much we explain to people on our choice of lifestyle, they will never accept it. We as a society live in denial. No one is cautious.No one wants to acknowledge false cases related to dowry, domestic violence etc etc.No one wants to accept that the institution of marriage has broken down.

This is the reason why MGTOW lifestyle is not accepted by the larger society. But here I ask one simple question? Are we breaking the law or committing a crime by being a MGTOW. Is remaining single and not getting married a grave crime? NO!!! The legal system does not have any problem. Our lifestyle is not harming anyone , so why care.

Just remember, If you are a MGTOW, you have the strength and courage to live an independent life, something that majority of the Indian men cannot do or still dream about. You are exploring yourself and going ahead by focusing on what you want and where you wish to be. So go ahead and live that MGTOW lifestyle.

As far the society is concerned, it can go to hell. 

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day promise to be back with a lot more.

Feelings of the Single Indian man while watching sunset-Bhaveen Sheth -DOTSIM-INDIAN MGTOW

As the sun sets down and the dusk takes over , you realize that just another lonely day is over.Just another day filled without love, care and affection.There is another lonely night that one has to endure. And still you look for another day, a day filled with hope, desire and expectations. Another day to look forward to make your life better.

Bhaveen Sheth

INDIAN MGTOW

The commodification of the Indian man-Bhaveen Sheth-DOTSIM-Indian MGTOW

The single Indian man would like to counter and challenge the feminist narrative about Indian women being objectified, meaning they are looked upon from their skin colour, looks and body shapes. But what about the Indian man. Is he not being treated as a commodity who comes with a price tag? Please find my reasoning in the below write up.

No other society has judged, labelled and priced its men like the Indian society, An Indian man is nothing but a sum total of his education, job designation, monthly salary, vehicle and property ownership. Rest does not matter. His character, morals behaviour and many other individual traits hold no importance.

The society treats an Indian man as a commodity put for display on a shelf.His job and salary decide his price tag and worth in the society. It is this very feature that makes him eligible in the marriage market.

For me, now a veteran MGTOW who gave up dreams on marriage a long time ago such things hardly matter.But I feel sorry for men who are looking out for a suitable life partner for marriage. Because they don't meet the required criteria they keep on getting rejected. Even the average Indian women who other wise have no significant achievements reject these men.

The commodification process of the Indian man starts right from his childhood, the day he was born.Good marks and grades in school, results of SSC and HSC, performance in entrance examinations, admission in good colleges, campus placements, packages and a lot more goes in the making up of a good Indian man.

The society complains  of the social evil called dowry. But aren't the Indian women equally responsible for it? Just look around, they all want well settled men who can take care of them and for that the girls parents are willing to go to any extent in paying a hefty dowry and financing a big fat Indian wedding. The truth is that the Indian men are bought at a price. This is the real commodification, the men come with a price tag.

The more successful the man is, the greater is his price tag in the marriage market.

Commodification of the Indian man has been existing from a long time. However in the last two decades it has reached magnanimous proportions. People often complain on the rising cases on divorces and breakdown in the family system but no one speaks on this evil of commodification. How can a marriage last when materialism and money take precedence over values, personality and behaviour. Does money and property decide long term compatibility?

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day and promise to be back with a lot more.

Bhaveen Sheth

INDIAN MGTOW.

Do we not feel? Don't we have emotions? Reflections of a single adult orphan.

I love the written word. I find solace in reading and writing. It is through my writings that I can express my feelings on loneliness, abandonment , prejudice, rage, dejection, disillusionment and helplessness.

These are my observations on living as a single adult orphan at the age of 36. In no way am I wallowing in self pity or seeking sympathy. However stories of my kind of people need to be read and heard by the general public so that they can empathize and not pass judgments or unnecessary conclusions.

So here I say, don't we feel? Don't we have emotions? Are we not human beings? Don't we have the right to live a happy life?

Twists and turns in fate and destiny can lead to drastic long term changes in the lives of people. It is resilience and capacity to cope that allows such people to come out of difficult situations.

No one discusses on the topic adult orphans.No one wants to know what kind of lives they   live. And yet if they chose to remain happy, the larger society has a problem with that.

Can't we be happy? Can't we enjoy just for ourselves? As an adult orphan there have been times when I have been called selfish. Is it wrong if I focus on my life? Is it wrong to be self centered?Yes I take myself out for lunch and dinner.I watch movies at cinema halls alone.I watch good movies/TV Shows and read good books. Should I wait for someone to come in my life in order to do this.

Don't we wish to travel and explore? There is a wanderer and explorer in all of us and travelling is something that we all want to do. Why should I wait for that someone special to come in my life? 

Aren't we humans? Don't we wish to be a part of a social circle? How much we wish to celebrate our important days and festivals with someone we are connected to. We also wish for companionship, love, care, affection and compassion.We wish to be loved and want to love someone special.We also look for a larger acceptance. We too have emotions. We brood silently, we keep our sorrows in our hearts. At times we feel sad and there is nothing that we can do about it.

Life is unfair and this is something that we adult orphans have accepted a long time ago. We don't want any form of pity and sympathy from the society.

What I find disgusting is that people question my trustworthiness, character, morals, integrity and background. People take me for granted when they realize that I don't have parents.it gives them the permission to speak whatever they want without realizing how I feel. No one says anything to mediocre men who also happen to be immature just because they have parents.

Can't we have some basic standards? Can't we have expectation?If any adult orphan were to have basic expectations, it goes against them. After all how of all the people can adult orphans can have expectations?Don't we have the right to choose? Are we street mongrels?

Why do we only get those alliances who have no takes? Why have we become someone's last resort , hobson's choice or devils alternative? Is it wrong to have basic expectations?

We may be adult orphans but we too are human beings.Stop criticizing us.Stop telling us to change. Stop telling us how we should live our lives. We know better than you. It is easy to pass comments but difficult to help us.We are what we are and have no complaints.

As normal human beings we strive for a better life everyday and wish to be happy. Just remember that we too are human being and we have emotions and feelings. Stop treating us as subhumans.

A silent life of stoicism-Bhaveen Sheth-Indian MGTOW

At this age I have come to a gradual acceptance of my own life. I am now learnt to be stoic. There is nothing that I can change and nothing I can do to change the Indian society. Accepting single life wholeheartedly, I  see that my life is going in  a different direction. I have accepted the fact that I may remain single for the rest of my life, I have accepted the fact that I may not have a spouse to support me or may not have children.. Maybe family life and fatherhood is not for me.

Stoicism is important. You need to live your life and keep on doing your work without complaining about your personal problems. You just have to move on and stop living in your past.

It also mean that you become strong and stop being vulnerable. Stop relying of people for emotional support. At the end of the day you are for yourself and there no no one for you.

For all those single Indian men out there and my fellow MGTOW's, you have to be strong and live a life of stoicism Accept your current situation and move on for a better future.

That is all I can say for now.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day and promise to be back with a lot more.

Bhaveen Sheth

INDIAN MGTOW

How a closed heart has kept me safe-Bhaveen Sheth INDIAN MGTOW

Over the years I have closed my heart. I have never allowed feelings of love and affection decide my behaviour. I have tried to remain away from the female gender and keep a safe distance. My interaction with women has always remained professional. Yes I have a closed heart, I don't express my feelings or emotions in front of women as I feel it will make me vulnerable.

I have become a bohemian who lives for himself. My social interaction is with limited number of people and I guess that is the way I have been over the years. Marriage proposals hardly came for me and I didn't bother much. I guess when you are adult orphan in India no family wants to associate with you. I have accepted that.

In matters of love and affections I have lived with caution. I chose not to develop feelings for any woman. Heartbreaks can be devastating. I feel that I have done the right thing by keeping a closed heart. It has kept me safe. I times of divorces and marital breakdowns, I am happy to not have gone through such things. I don't have the strength to lose someone again whom I have dearly loved. I guess I won't be able to take it.

I am happy with my solo life and will try to keep a closed heart. Can't say what the future holds but as of now the status quo remains the same.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the say and promise to be back with a lot more.