My Quora post on why I am still single-Bhaveen Sheth-INDIAN MGTOW

For a long time I wanted to write an answer to this question but was hesitant. Finally I have picked up the strength to write. Please find my profile below:

Age: 36

Qualification: Dual Masters in Management

Designation: Manager-Human Resources in a reputed Organization

CTC: The best as per industry norms

Then why I am I still single? Because I am an adult orphan! Don;t have parents or any other family support (lost my parents at a young age). A self made man who has achieved everything on his own (not boasting about it). Unfortunately in our society a man , his character and image is defined by by his family background and not by his individuality.

Most of my late teens and 20’s have been spent on getting a decent education and building a career. I started looking out for marriage in my late 20’s but it never materialized. I have shared by own experiences on finding a suitable match on matrimonial websites. You can search my answer by going through my profile.

Society does not consider me as a marriage material as I am an adult orphan. With no family background, no one would consider me, certainly not the people who state they come form a decent, respectable and reputed families and are equally looking for guys belonging from a respectable family. The moment people realize that I have no family background, they back out. In my case to cut the long story short, due to family conflicts my extended family does not want to support me. I guess over the years we have become distant and drifted apart.

PRAGMATIC AND STOICAL ATTITUDE

At 19 when a major tragedy occurs in someones life, he/she has to mature overnight and take responsibilities.The same happened with me. Over the years I have developed an attitude towards life filled with pragmatic stoicism. Some people find my behavior to be negative, cynical and pessimistic which is not the case. There is nothing wrong is being positive but one can certainly not live in a Utopian world filled with fantasy. Unfortunately I come across a majority that is still living in the world of Bollywood films.

At 36, I myself don’t have any high expectations form a future partner. I just want a simple homely woman who can be by companion cum best friend. My demands are normal. I don’t expect any dowry or a lavish wedding ceremony, just a court marriage or marriage in a temple. Having a middle class mentality , I can provide a comfortable living to my spouse.

I am blunt and straight forward to the point when I state my expectations to potential interests. In a world filled with people who speak sweet and sugar coated lies, my blunt reality often sounds acerbic.

I refuse to compromise on certain things when it comes to marriage. I don’t prefer divorcees, single mothers and left over women (women whom no one wants to marry). Considering my own background some people have told me that I should have an open mind and broaden my options. Why? I am not a divorcee. I am not a single father. I am not a left over man. I don’t want to marry a woman who is desperate just because her biological clock is ticking or there is a peer/society pressure one her to get married.

Being an adult orphan, I am often taken for granted. There are some families who just want to dump their daughters/sisters on me and wash away their responsibilities. Yes there are such people and they exist on both sides (males and females). A woman post 30 not able to get married even after repeated efforts does bring frustrations on the family.

I often get referred to divorcees.Now I don’t have a problem with that but the cautious person within me makes me ask the female divorce and her parents that they show me the copy of the divorce decree from her first marriage. And then it is BINGO! They back out. Some find it offensive that I asked for a divorce decree. Now in times of false dowry and domestic violence cases filled by our empowered women, I tread a cautious path. And then most of the divorcees that I have met seem to be a depressed and dejected lot. Looks like they have still not come out of their divorce.

I chose not to marry a single mother no matter how good she may be. I have no interest in playing the role of a step father or being a financial support system cum ATM card for THE PROUD SINGLE MOTHER. Seems like these single moms only want a man with no children. They won’t marry a single father or a elder man. The last thing I want is to have a step child treat me like an unwanted piece of trash,

I strongly refuse to play by the rules of the girl and her parents. Some people think that they can mold/change me so that I live my life as my their terms and conditions and meet their expectations. I don’t entertain unwanted and unsolicited advice on how I should change my lifestyle just because it suits the requirement of the girl and her parents.

I don’t understand why I should relocate to the girl’s hometown. WHY? As per the Indian custom , it is the girl who should be relocating to the husband’s place and not vice versa. I am not aiming for a career oriented woman who wants to climb the corporate ladder or is in the IT industry hence finds it difficult to relocate. A woman doing a normal job can always find a new one a new place or she can chose not to work. Now if some parents are so concerned about their daughter’s safety (unwilling to relocate), then they should consider a man from their city itself.

At 36, I am a mature adult and prefer to speak to a woman above 30 in a one to one conversation. But that does not happen. In 90 percent of the cases, it is either the parents of siblings who converse with me.If after crossing 30 a woman is not confident to initiate a conversation what is the point? It seems that all these single independent confident women develop some sort of cold feet. Even if the daughter is 32–35 years old her parents will talk to you as if she was a 20 year old novice girl. Seriously!!!! C’mon dude! Accept the fact that your daughter is a grown up mature women and not a little girl anymore.

Being an independent self made man, I do expect an woman with an independent thinking mature enough to take her own life decisions and is street smart. This does not mean that one should be highly educated as I have come across such highly educated women who are jobless dumb retards.I am yet to come across a strong willed woman who has a humble feminine grace. Women often complain that they come across 30 plus Indian men who are immature, childish, pampered mamma’s boys but take it from me there are equally the same number of thirty plus women who still behave like teenagers living in a fantasy world, spoilt and pampered daddy’s princesses who cannot face the challenges of real life.

I don’t believe in hookups, affairs and one night stands. I am not a playboy or a Casanova. I don;t believe in chasing young girls. I can;t develop physical intimacy with woman unless I have a strong emotional connection with her.

At 36 I am still a virgin and not embarrassed about it. Some men advise me to visit a brothel or go to to Thailand for sex tourism. Indian brothels are filthy and there is a high chance of getting infected with STDs. I don’t believe in wasting my hard of money on such things.

I don’t own a property and am currently living on rent. Marriage alliances only wants a guy who has his own apartment. I fail to understand this logic. Living on rent is far more cheaper than buying a flat that adds a monthly burden of EMI’s. I intend to buy a flat when I decide to shift to a place when I feel I can spend the rest of my life, Living in a rented apartment is not a disgrace.

I have the personality of a sigma male. While I don’t have a dominating nature, I believe that in a relationship the man should have an upper hand.This does not mean that the woman should be subdued. Many important decisions can be taken through joint consensus. I don’t like being dominated or being taken for granted.I can’t be like today’s beta Indian husbands who suck up to their wives and play the role of a second fiddle/cum pet dog to their wives, they typical manginas.

So this is why I am single and believe me , I am not alone or lonely because for the last 12 years I have have the support of this woman (pic below)

She came in my life as a friend and has now become my sister, mentor, mother, parent and guardian angel. She has played a crucial role in my growth and development. She represents on my behalf as a family member and not only her, her husband , sister and parents collectively play the role of a family.

Sadly our narrow minded society does not understand or accept this.People fail to see that there is something beyond blood/family relations.Bonds of friendship are stronger than blood relations.People don’t understand the concept of foster families and I don’t need to explain myself.

Mind you, this is not a rant of frustration or a desperate cry to seek sympathy or validation from anyone.

And if there is any like minded person who wishes to associate with me, please feel free to message me.

Regards,

Bhaveen Sheth

Inspirational videos on living a meaningful single life: Bhaveen Sheth-INDIAN MGTOW

The single Indian man and Indian MGTOW would like to share two inspiring videos that he come across on you tube. Hope you will like it:

I hope you would have found these vidoes inspiring.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day and promise to be back with a lot more.

BHAVEEN SHETH

INDIAN MGTOW

For the Indian man, it is education that crushes his child hood and Marriage that crushes his adulthood-Bhaveen Sheth-Indian MGTOW

A few days back I was reading a book where the author writes on the stress that Indian students face related to examinations , courtesy, our education system and high expectations of Indian parents. I thought over and realized how many Indian men loose the best years of their lives just by studying and rote learning. The age where one has to explore and learn new skills is spent on books. A typical day starts with school, coaching classes and studies at home. Where is the time for hobbies, sports, explorations and life skills?

Late teens and early 20's is all about slogging at colleges for assignments, marks, grades and GPA's and later its is about  placements,jobs and salaries. I mean when we reach 30 and look back, what is it that we have done? Do we have any hobbies? Do we have life skills? Hell , we can't even replace the punctured tyre of our two wheeler or can't even install a new ceiling fan? Have we travelled and done solo back packing anywhere? No!! Not even in India.

And then we as Indian men get married at the right age and after 2 years have a child. Life goes for a toss. It is office and home. Weekends are about going to D Mart/Big Bazaar and Malls or multiplexes. It is home loans, car loans and EMI's.

This is where marriage crushes your adult life. All those dreams and ambitions you had after completing your post graduation and on joining your first job just got fizzled out. I am not saying that marriage is a bad institution. But my point is that as Indian men , we should learn to experience life before tying the knot.

I have seen many married people having regrets on things that they wished for and wanted but  never happened due to the responsibilities that came with marriage.

Hence I write this blogpsot  that  if education destroys childhood then marriage destroys adulthood for men at least in India.

This is Bhaveen Sheth singing off for the day and promise to be back with a lot more.

BHAVEEN SHETH

INDIAN MGTOW

Sometimes they forget that we too are human beings-Bhaveen Sheth-Indian MGTOW

Single Indian men are invisible creatures, they are forgotten and forsaken. No one barring a few have any interest in them. The society does not even consider them as Humans.People forget that we are single due to our circumstances or our own lifestyle choices. There are men who have gone through bitter separations and now wish to have no more of married life, there are men who have walked out of their dysfunctional families and have no one they can relate to and then there are men who are Adult Orphans having no one in this world.

However we too are human beings and we also have feelings,emotions, desires, hopes, hobbies and most important the right to dignified living. Why then are we ridiculed, taunted and put down because of our status?Why does the society shut its door on us and why are we isolated?

There are no definitive answers to what I have asked but the majority should understand that we too are humans and we have an equal right to live and enjoy our lives. The majority of the married folks don't understand, they cannot be empathetic. We are a society where everyone by default follows the rules and by rules it also means that your get married and settle down. The married majority looks upon us the single minority with some sort of prejudice and grudge.

And I say that we too are humans , we are also someone's children just like you are. We too are mortals who are vulnerable and who have made mistakes. We have gone through difficult times and come out of it.

In today's era of  militant and toxic feminism, misandry and gynocentrism, we have to be careful, we have to watch our backs. The women no longer have that grace and feminine values that a man looks for in a woman.The demands and expectations of the Indian women and their parents have made marriage to be extremely difficult. The humiliating experiences faced by many Indian men during matrimonial meets makes them question the very institution of marriage. This sacred institution is now reduced to nothing but materialistic demands made up of a 3 BHK apartment, annual foreign vacations, 1 luxurious car, evening dine outs and god knows what. As Indian men we are nothing but  providers and dispensable ATM cards.

And then you have men with no proper backgrounds, men who have walked away from their dysfunctional families or men who are orphans, these category of men who don't stand a chance of ever getting married because of their family backgrounds. I myself being an Adult Orphan have experienced first hand at the ill treatment of the society. I have no grudge or complaints, I just want to live my life.

There are many Indian men across India who are single by choice, many of them have adopted the MGTOW philosophy, They have nothing to do with marriage or society, these men are making the best to their lives, including me. We read, eat out , watch movies , take vacations, travel, pursue our hobbies and some even have short term flings. We are just living our lives. But then that is where the majority married folks have a problem. They can't see us doing all such things.

Time and again we are told that we are being selfish. Is it selfish to enjoy? Seriously dude! You are so prejudiced. Just thank us for whatever we do, at-least we don't break the law. We are not like those single Haryanvi men who are loaded with testesterone waiting to rape/molest any girl who comes across them. We are well aware of the gynocentric laws in our country and as decent educated law abiding citizens we keep a safe distance from women.

As Single Indian men we have the right to a dignified life. Our solo status is a not disability and we have the right to do things , simple ordinary things that makes us happy. We don't want to be questioned and we don't need any advice. To each one his own.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off the day and promise to be back with a lot more.

Avoid negative, depressed, frustrated and toxic Indian men-BHAVEEN SHETH INDIAN MGTOW

The single Indian man writes on the need to avoid toxic Indian men who have a negative influence upon you. Generally your behaviour gets shaped by the people around you and your daily interactions. Interactions with toxic Indian men will drain you emotionally and zap your energy. Mentioned below are the categories of Indian men you must avoid:

The frustrated married men:Being happily married is a myth, especially in India.Many married Indian men are frustrated being stuck in a dysfunctional marriage with spouses they hate. If truth be told, marriage is one big responsibility dumped on them due to parental pressure. Indian men are equally not prepared to take up responsibilities that come up with marriage and parenthood.Two years into a marriage leaves them with disillusionment.They are stuck at being a husband, father, husband, son-in-law and adding to their miseries are home loans, care loans, monthly expenditures etc etc. Many Indian men are denied sex by their wives leaving them sexually frustrated. They crib and complain for no reason, they lech upon young girls and talk bullshit and ridiculous things.Most of their conversations revolves around family and children and keep complaining about their dumb boring mediocre lives.Some will even share stories of their frustrated marriages, toxic spouses and dysfunctional marriages. Interactions with these men will leave you depressed and given young wrong picture about marriage.

The divorced men: If marriages are made in heaven then divorces are made in hell at-least in India. The complicated process of getting a divorce in Indian leaves you emotionally drained and financially bankrupt, courtesy, alimony and child support.Divorce scars a man emotionally.Many divorced men are not able to recover completely from their failed marriages. They carry their pasts like an albatross wrapped around their necks.Here are some of their common characteristics: Being aloof, becoming aggressive, extremely patriarchal, hating the women gender are some common characteristics. They have no hobbies or interests outside work. Some start looking for a soul mate immediately after divorce without introspecting what is wrong with them.Any interaction with them will leave you with a feeling that all Indian women are evil and poisonous.

The frustrated single Man: Now this is a sexually frustrated immature man child who has never grown up an wants to get married by hook or by crook.. Chances are that majority of these Indian men belong to the hinterlands of North Indian or what is known as the BIMARU states ( please google the acronym). For them getting married is a one stop solution to all their problems.And for some reason these men are not getting married.They keep on meeting prospective women and keep getting rejected leaving them disillusioned. Other than this they will blame the whole world for their problems.These men have nothing interesting to do in their lives other than their boring jobs, they have no other interests or hobbies.Any interacting with these men with make you feel worthless and you will get the feeling that solo living is indeed a wrong choice.

Life is all about ups and downs and there are 2 sides to everything . There are men who are happily married and then there are men who went through bad divorces, rehabilitated themselves and went on to live a wonderful life.There are men who are single living an adventurous life.. SO please do not limit your boundaries  based on your interaction with a few men especially the toxic ones.There is no need to associated with toxic men. Identify positive men and develop meaningful relationships with them.

Over the years I have realized that the company and social circle you keep can have a tremendous impact on your personality.If you want to have a vibrant and positive personality then you need to interact with the right kind of people.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day and promise to be back with a lot more.

Bhaveen Sheth

Expressing thoughts and feelings through movies

In a short post the single Indian man would like to write his thoughts and feelings on the lives of Indian men, misandry , Gynocentrism and MGTOW PHILOSOPHY. 

Movies are great example showcasing the realities of our society. We get so see everything, right from traditional patriarchy to the rise of the rabid radical third wave feminism. One gets to see how our society has fallen down to low levels. Write ups showcasing movies (both Hollywood and Bollywood) will give a chance to my readers in understanding the underlying themes and taking wisdom from the same.

I hope you will love my upcoming writers.

A heretic in the world of believers and confirmists-Bhaveen Sheth-DOTSIM

In a world filled with believers and conformists, unmarried single men like me  stand out to be seen as heretics,non conformists and apostates. Our problem is that we refuse to confirm to the rules of the society. We chose to live a life of our own cherishing our independence and solitude. 

We are heretics because as single men we are a minority in a society filled with married people having families.Some of us have happily chosen a solo life and we are living it 100 percent. Our happiness stands out and we become a pain for others. Remember those ancient times when kingdoms used to put God above everything and all subjects were expected to rever the almighty God. Those who rejected the god were branded as heretics and persecuted, some kingdoms showed liniecy and banished or exiled the heretics from the kingdom. This is exactly what is happening today.The single Indian men are being seen as heretics and are facing a similar kind of discrimination.

We need to stand up for ourselves and not give in to the demands of the society. Marriage is a second religion in India and everyone is expected to follow it. But I don't. I have no faith in an institution that is purely formed on the platform of materialistic requirements. Yes and like many single Indian men , I too am a heretic,non believer and non conformist.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing of for the day and promise to be back with a lot more.

Bhaveen Sheth 

Indian MGTOW