Bhaveen Sheth, the writer of this post writes on the sky high expectations that today's modern Indian women have from a marriage. Due to such high expectations they reject each and every potential alliance. Later they find it difficult to get married and end up living a miserable single life.
Now a days it is quite normal to read and hear on a number of modern educated urban Indian women who are still single in their 30's and 40's.
While staunch feminists are applauding this growing population of single Indian women, there are many who have stated that such a trend will have disastrous consequences on women.
So why are many educated working urban Indian women remaining single? The answer that they state is that they have still not come across the right person. "I am still waiting to find Mr.Perfect:."There are no decent single guys available"."I will not compromise on my standards and marry below my level."
Right guy, perfect guy and high standards. Ohhh man!!!!
I don't know what these women mean when they mention the above written words. At present many women are confused. They are not able to decide. Many still go by the face value or the financial status of the person.
Expectations are all the same. The dream guy should have it all, wealth of Bill Gates, body of Hritik Roshan and charms of Shah Rukh Khan.
And then I would like to ask these women one question, just one question.Are you perfect? I mean, seriously, are you perfect??Just look at yourself in the mirror. For starters look at yourself. No, I will not comment on your physique because if I do so , I may incur the wrath of the feminists. Do you have that figurine hour glass body? Are you lean? Are you picture perfect? No, you are not!!.
Many such women having high standards are average, just average:average in everything. They have an average intellect, they hold average jobs, they have no major accomplishments. They come from an average family background, the ubiquitous middle class family. But the expectations of these women are sky high. They live in a world of fantasy and think that one Mr.Charming/Mr.Perfect is waiting for them out there in some part of the world.
These women are not getting younger as the days go by. Year after year their chances of getting married are diminishing. The only thing that remains static is their sky high expectations. At present they are in the prime of their youth and think that men in their early and mid 30's are too old for them.They love rejecting potential suitors. For them face value, professional qualifications and remuneration of men are parameters decided when considering someone as their future husbands. Every potential groom is rejected by these women.They get some sort of pleasure in humiliating and taunting potential suitors. Many such women want to convey a message to their parents on their sky high high expectations by rejecting potential suitors.
Frankly speaking, these suitors are not bad. They come from decent families, hold good qualifications and have respectable and well paying jobs. They are the real Indian men, men who are not superficial, men who are real marriage material and qualify to become good husbands and fathers. But just because these good men don't match up to the sky high expectations of these women, they get rejected. Nothing happens to them, they eventually find good women, get happily married and start a family.
But what about our women with sky high expectations??
To tell the caustic and acerbic truth, these women end up being single for the rest of their lives. They cross their 20's and enter into their 30's. They become the leftover women, an of the shelf product, something that has now gone beyond its expiry date. They are no longer sought after in the matrimonial market.This is one harsh reality about the Indian society. No matter how modern and educated we the people of India become;we remain traditional and conservative at the core level. A woman past 30 is not considered desirable. Matrimonial alliances now become hard to come by. The one who used to reject has now become the rejected.Even some alliances that came through family relations have now stopped coming.Now they get alliances from the rejected and dejected men, you know the kind of guys that no one wants to marry, divorcees, widowers, single fathers, physically disabled, fat, obese and what not.
Year after year desperation and frustration rises amongst such women but there is no solution. Peers and colleagues of these women are now happily married and have children of their own.For these single women, a solo life becomes extremely difficult. Feelings of dejection and depression set in. It is now that they realize that they were wrong and wrong indeed.It is now that they look back retrospectively and realize that the men they rejected would have become good husbands and caring fathers of their children, had they married them. But now that time has gone. At present there are just a few suitable and many unsuitable men men available for them, but these women still won't marry because of their sky high expectations that have never changed over the years.
As I conclude the post, I describe the present lives of these women and how it looks. For women who are now in their 20's having high expectations, I request that they should carefully read the following paragraph as it reveals the trials and tribulations of living a single life in India.
The scenario is something like this. There is this single depressed Indian woman, now in her late 30's or early 40's living a miserable life.Her parents have aged and are now worried about who will take care of their daughter after they die. Her brothers and sisters are now married and happily settled. They have gradually distanced themselves from her. No one invites her to any social function or occasion.Men of all kinds try to hit on her thinking that she is an easy available sex object.She craves and yearns for emotional support but she gets none.Her physical needs and wants remain unfulfilled. She has now become an outcast in her own society, amongst her own people.She returns to an empty house and has her lunch and dinner alone. There are times when she falls sick and there is no one by her side.There are times when she wants speak with someone but there is no one to listen to her. Festivals and birthdays have now stopped being of any importance to her. She has no one forward to look for, nothing to live for. Life has now become a mundane and boring existence.
This is the fate of many such single Indian women who have standards/expectations from marriage.This is the price they eventually pay.
This is Bhaveen Sheth signing out for the and will be back with a lot more.
Bhaveen Sheth
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