To start with Mark Zuckerberg- Many of you who are reading this blog post will ask "Who is this Man"?? " "Aree eee aadmi kaun hai"??. Many people asking this question are ardent users of Facebook, the online social networking site but still don't know who is its founder.
Yes, my dear Ignorant Friends, Mark Zuckerberg is the founder of Facebook, the globally famous social network used by millions all over the world.
However I am not here to give out information on his Life or his journey in making facebook and eventually turning into a Billionaire. My blog post here is to educate my Indian fellow Men and Woman and the Indian Society on the lessons that we can learn from Mark Zuckerberg's marriage.
Being the Founder, Chairman, Chief Executive Officer and a Billionaire one would expect a Big fat American wedding filled with extravagance and mindless display of wealth. But that did not happen. In a simple ceremony held in the backyard of his home with guests numbering to 100 members, Mark got married to his long time sweet heart Prsicilla Chan. Now here are some lessons that we Indian can learn from Him.
A Simple Wedding
In times of recession and rising prices one must resort to cost cutting and cost containment. But We Indians being Indians don't follow this wisdom when it comes to marriage.
If one looks at Mark Zuckerberg, he got married to his long time girlfriend in a simple wedding ceremony in the Backyard of his Villa. There we no more that a 100 guests. The occasion was basically to celebrate the Graduation of Priscilla ( She graduated as a Doctor and will soon pursue his interests in Pediatrics), however it came a a double suprise to all the visitors when he announced the plans of his wedding.
The food was brought from a nearby restaurant which happens to be the favorite of both Mark and Priscilla and the entire ceremony was kept simple with minimum costs involved.
Now compare someone on the level of Mark Zuckerberg getting married in India. It will become a National Event, the best and expensive of everything available in the Matrimonial Market will be bought.There will be an open display of wealth and not to say that unwanted and useless waste of money. The wedding itself will be a national event covered by the Television and Print Media.
Forget that ,even the Middle Class India gets married in all pomp and show, the same people who crib all the time on the rising costs of living will not even think twice on spending huge amounts on marriage.
So lesson Number One to be Learnt is HAVE A SIMPLE WEDDING, IF MARK ZUCKERBERG COULD HAVE IT ,SO CAN WE.
A Marriage Based on understanding and not on the Union of Classes
Mark Zuckerberg could have got the best of the best woman from the rich elite class of America. Being a Billionaire he could have chosen to get married to a Billionaire or the Daughter of a Billionaire. After all it would have been a consolidation of Wealth , power and getting together of an elite class.
But he chose to marry a woman who came from a very simple background and had middle class upbringings. Priscilla Chan is the Daughter of a Chinese-Vietnameese Immigrant who came to America as refugee. Her father Dennis Chan worked hard ,sometimes up to 18 hours in a restaurant trying to earn a living and eventually he went about to open his own restaurant.
Inspite of having a simple middle class background Mark Married Priscilla.Because it is a marriage based on understanding of each other.
Now compare that to India, instead of a union between two individuals, marriage is a union between two classes and they have to be equal.Family Background, Money, Wealth, Property, Possessions, everything is given due consideration before giving an approval for the wedding.
So Lesson Two states that "GET MARRIED BASED ON LIKING AND UNDERSTANDING AND NOT TO CONSOLIDATE YOUR CLASS OR TO ENHANCE YOUR FAMILY STATUS."
No Qualms of Marrying a lesser Educated Spouse.
Priscilla is an MD Doctor having graduated from Harvard and further having done her MD from University of California while Mark Zuckerberg is a college drop out from Harvard. This did not however become an impediment for their marriage. Both of them respected each other and accepted the other one. Just a mere college degree was not prerequisite for a Marriage.
Come to India and now these days Education is given a lot of importance. A typical average Indian Man would not like to marry a strong Independent educated or sometimes over educated woman. Why this mentality prevails is something that I have not been able to decipher. But the reality is that an average Indian Man feels threatened and insecure if his would be wife is better educated and better off than him.
The same can be applied to the Indian Woman, going by Mark-Prsicilla example. How many educated woman do we come across who have openly refused to marry a lesser educated man , even if he was doing well professionally. Just look at the Woman who become Doctors, majority of them clearly express their desire to marry a doctor only and no one else. Why??? Are Professions other than Medicine inferior or demeaning?????
So Lesson No Three States that "EDUCATION OF EITHER OF THE SPOUSE SHOULD NOT BE THE BONE OF CONTENTION FOR MARRIAGE, IF BOTH THE PARTNERS ARE WELL SETTLED ON THE PROFESSIONS FRONT, THEN GO AHEAD AND TAKE THE CALL."
An Inter-Continental, Inter-racial and Inter-religious Love Marriage
Oh Dear!!!! Now that must be too much, had this happened in India it would have lead to a riot, but facts are facts and no one can shun the reality.
Mark Zuckerberg is an American Jew while Priscilla Chan is an Asian American and probably practices bhuddism, taoism or christianity( press reports are not clear on her religious affiliation). But such things did not come in the way of their Marriage.
Coming to India as I have mentioned before such an alliance would have sparked a riot in the Locality. We Indians are known for our intolerance towards people even if they belong to our country.
Marriages in India will only happen if both the couple belong to the same caste, subcategory, social class, GOTHRA, religion, linguistic background and compatible Horoscope matches. No one looks at the compatibility factor in between the couples. Inter caste Marriages are looked down upon and Inter religious marriages are boycotted openly, you can just forget Intercontinental and Inter racial love marriage.
We the people of India no matter how educated we become, remain narrow minded fanatics who openly advocate hatred and intolerance towards others.
Lesson Number 4: "UNDERSTANDING, LOVE AND COMPATIBILITY SHOULD BE SEEN IN A MARRIAGE AND NOT THE CASTE, COMMUNITY, RELIGION and LANGUAGE.
I hope my Indian Fellow Men and Woman will gain some wisdom after reading this post and apply the same in their real lives.
This is Bhaveen Sheth Signing off for the day, will be back with Some more.
Bhaveem Sheth
