Being Self Centered does not mean being selfish

Bhaveen Sheth, the single Indian man clarifies on being self centered

As the single Indian male,I,  Bhaveen Sheth is often accused of being a selfish person.My critics have stated that I am self obsessed narcissist who just wants to live for himself. Some of my detractors have criticized me for being an irresponsible self indulgent person who wants to run away form the challenges of life rather than facing them head on.

WHY???? Well because I am now in my early 30's and unmarried, that's why???

So here I voice my opinion , not only for myself but for many single Indian men who are in their 30's and are not intending to get married.

There is a big difference in being selfish and being self centered.What I fail to understand is why does the Indian society put so much emphasis on getting married and associating this (un)holy institution with being a responsible person!!!!

Do married Indian men play the role of a responsible husband and father???? I seriously have my doubts?????

So why are we single Indian men labelled as selfish just because we do not want to share our lives with a woman???

A year after I deleted all my online matrimonial profiles

On 8th of March 2014 (last year) , I deleted all my online matrimonial profiles. It was certainly an eventful day to take such a step (International Women's day)

Growing up in my 20's, like every other single Indian man, I too had dreams of getting married some day. Having no proper family background and no relatives to stand or speak on my behalf, I created my profile on different online matrimonial sites that had sprung up over the last decade. What followed was a roller coaster ride of nothing but disappointment and dejection. I will mention my experiences on subsequent blogposts.

Later after a lot of soul searching I finally realized that I was not marriage material. I decided to give up my search for a soul mate and deleted all my matrimonial profiles.

A years after deleting the same, I would like to write down my observations below:

No false hopes and no bitter disappointments

Every expression of matrimony on profile raised a sense of false hope. There were times when I used to feel that this was the person made for me. Little did I realize that these women or their parents were checking me out as a potential candidate that might meet their requirements or expectations. Talks with some girls did give me a sense of fale hope and elation only to be hit by a bitter sense of disappointment when I got rejected. I started feeling that I had joined the category of the dejected and the rejected.

After deleting my profiles, I have never had such negative feelings because there were no rejections and no disappointments.

The checklist for a sensationally satisfied single Indian man

Making your own personal schedule and coming and going as you please.

To cook what you like and eat when you choose.

To travel across the length and breadth of this country.

To live peacefully in a modest apartment registered in your name.

To listen to the music of your choice.

To catch up with your long lost friends when you desire.

Provide all kinds of pleasures to yourself, sexual or otherwise.

Not having anyone to argue with.

Feeling emotionally safer in being solo.

Not having to give up on all that growth and change that you have experienced over the years.

To celebrate the person that you have become and not wanting to loose him.

To have no worries of being emotionally abused.

To flirt without repercussion.

To have pretty low maintenance and quality lifestyle.

To keep yourself entertained at all time.

To avoid having an emotional roller coaster ride that many married couples go through.

To accept the fact, sometimes with happiness and sometimes with stoicism, that with or without a partner life is great.