The COVID pandemic will be seen as one of the greatest tragedies of the 21st Century. Two years on and India is still reeling from the after effects of this pandemic. Our economy is in shambles, business is bad, Inflation is all time high, jobs are not easy to come by and things are getting difficult day by day.
Still we the people of India will go on doing what we were doing best, Marriage. Even during this Covid Pandemic, people did not stop from getting married.
With all kinds of scams that emerged during the pandemic, a new one is gradually being observed. i.e the case of fake widows on the online matrimonial sites.
The pandemic has become an excuse for many divorced, separated women and single mothers to claim themselves to be widows and marry a naive person. I spoke to two men who got trapped in this kind of marriage. The first one was looking for an understanding life partner, he was clear that he would not marry a divorcee considering how today's women are using the gender biased laws against their in-laws and husbands. He came across a profile stating that the woman was a widow having lost her husband in the pandemic. Interest was expressed, numbers were exchanged and conversations took place. This man even visited the woman's city and spoke to her at a coffee shop and later took her for dinner at a restaurant. He was convinced that finally he had found his life partner and wanted to marry her. He went back, spoke to his parents, while the parents initially expressed skepticism, later they agreed for the marriage. The marriage took place, everything went well. A month later a major catastrophe struck, he came across his wive's documents where it was stated that she was a divorcee and later he also came across a divorcee decree wherein his wife had claimed alimony and had filled 498a and DV against her husband. While his wife was divorced, she had got a huge alimony as a settlement. This man was devastated and went into depression.He confronted his wife only to see a different side of the woman he had truly loved. She laughed at him and threatened him that were he to leave her or tell this to anyone, she would file false cases against the husband and his parents. The man backed off and accepted his fate. He feels to have been badly cheated.
The second case is just like the one above, the only difference is that the man was a never married bachelor in his mid 40s looking for a life partner. He too got conned by this so called single mother widow who again had lost her husband in the pandemic and was looking for a supportive life partner. In reality this woman was divorced, her husband was very much alive and she was shamelessly claiming child support. Her first husband was not even aware that she was got married for the second time.
In both these cases the husbands were alive. With rising awareness among the Indian men and their families, never married men are refraining from getting married to divorcees considering the fact many women have used the legal system to their advantage. No decent man or his family wants to be accused of false dowry cases, domestic violence and be arrested. Hence the hesitancy. People will always prefer a widow.
So some cunning, calculating women and their parents convincingly take up the widow status and the Covid pandemic is a wonderful excuse as it claimed the lives of both old and young ones. And here you have a bechari young widow who lost her husband, you have an abhla single mother widow who is looking for a supportive husband who will also accept her child.
My dear single Indian men, please beware of this scam. Don't be desperate to get married. It is better to be single than be sorry. If you come across such profiles where interests are expressed, please do your background verification. Hire a private detective, scout her history, as for the death certificate of her husband, verify it with the mortuary, ask for her past family photographs, ask for the husbands medical records, the respective state governments are also giving some kind of covid benefits to the families of the deceased, please ask for this kind of certificate. all hospitals are issuing it.
Do a thorough investigation, today narratives can easily be changed and a calculating thug can easily play the role of the victim. Understand that you should not be conned. Both of these men fell into the trap because they were lured by the beauty of the women.
I have my sympathy for all those women who genuinely lost their husbands during the pandemic, in many cases the husbands were the sole earners/bread winners and now the responsibility of taking care of the family has fallen upon the widowed wives. May god give all these women the strength and courage to carry on with this challenging journey ahead.
What I dislike is how the widow status is being misused in order to trap naive innocent men into marriage. This brings a bad name to the women who have actually been widowed. Even they would want to find a decent life partner and give their life a new start, unfortunately with all these kinds of scams they too have come under scrutiny.
At the end of this post I want to clearly warn all the single Indian men; please be careful, keep an open mind, just because you hear someones sad plight does not mean you have to take it on face value. Never take a major life changing decision in desperation, always give it time. Be aware, be careful and be safe.
Bhaveen Sheth
INDIAN MGTOW.
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