Sunday, July 10, 2016

Single Indian men-Beware of the escort extortion rackets

Yesterday while browsing some news websites, I came across an article wherein  a commercial pilot sought companionship with a women on a adult website. Little did he know that he was falling into a trap. The woman from the site met and lured him to her flat. Later some guys claiming to be from the police crime branch burst into the flat and threatened the pilot that he would be implicated in a rape case if he did not pay. They extorted a huge amount from him. For more details you can read the link below:


Companionship is something that many single Indian men across India need. We still lack a proper dating platform where single people can meet. Many single men have to resort to dubious escort agencies to seek companionship. Many such agencies are extortion rackets where in some criminal elements  are waiting to pounce on vulnerable men.

Single Indian men should clearly refrain from taking any kind of service from such agencies. This is not the first case which has appeared in the media, there are many such incidents wherein men have been robbed in a similar modus operandi.

Hence I request all single Indian men to take caution and keep themselves away from such services.

Saturday, July 9, 2016

BHAVEEN SHETH-DOTSIM- EMOTIONALLY ABUSED INDIAN HUSBANDS

Bhaveen Sheth the writer of this blog writes on married Indian men who suffer from emotional abuse at the hands of their wives. I try to state the facts on emotional abuse faced by many Indian husbands to such an extent that many have been forced to commit suicide.

Not one day goes by when you don't get to hear or read on cases of domestic violence against Indian women in newspapers, internet or the social media. The feminist media has tried its best that any such cases whether real or fake are highlighted and given all kinds of publicity.

It is always the married Indian women who are physically abused, harassed, ill treated, beaten,battered, thrown out of the house. The media loves to make martyrs out of such Indian wives, not to say that they want to increase their own TRP ratings. No one focuses on emotionally abused Indian husbands. Their condition is at best forgotten.

I write on this topic as I feel that many Indian husbands are being emotionally and mentally harassed in India.A majority of such men choose to remain silent. They do not discuss their problems with anyone. As the years go by, abuse becomes more toxic.

Life has never been easy to men in India. Marriage is a ceremony that all Indian men want to undergo. They want the tangible and intangible benefits offered within the institution of marriage. Unfortunately real life is not a dream world, it is not some Yash Chopra movie where there is always a happy ending.

Many Indian women are smart and manipulative. They are aware of the weaknesses that Indian men have.They always want to have an upper hand in the marriage. Marriages in India have been all about mergers and acquisitions where both sides want to get maximum benefit out of the other.

One common observation about emotionally abused Indian husbands is that their wives  are stronger and more confident than them. It is the wife who takes all the decisions and it she who will call the shots. Another observation is that these wives are good looking and well groomed while the husbands are average or below average lookers.

So why do you have beautiful Hourie looking women getting married to an average Joe? The answer is simple! The guy is loaded . He comes from  a decent family, has good educational qualifications ( you know the IIT-IIM  passout, B-School pass out, software engineer, doctor, investment banker). He draws a good salary. All this is enough for a beautiful woman to marry him even if he is a dork.

Many such abused Indian husbands suffer from an inherent inferiority complex. They are men who are not confident, they suffer from a low self esteem, they have never discovered themselves, they never had any girlfriend before getting married, they never went out on  a date. These men were bought up under a strict patriarchal father and extremely loving and caring mother. Such men always seek validation , especially from women.They are emotionally dependent on their mothers and subsequently in the later years of their lives, their wives. It is this weakness that is exploited by the wife.

During the initial years of the marriage men may not notice emotional abuse but over the years the verbal abuse, taunts,criticism and sometimes physical abuse increases. These manipulative wives make their husbands so dependent on them that they end up seeking validation from their wives for each and every thing.

In the later stages things gets very bad.These wives want it all. They want to rule the house.The husband will naturally give in.Many such husbands are happy to play the role of a second fiddle.

And then the abuse becomes toxic.The husbands often get compared with other men who have been more successful than them. These manipulative wives openly insult and humiliate their husbands by stating that they have not been able to achieve anything when compared to other men.

Emotional tantrums are often thrown by the wives as they want to have what they want.There are times when the husbands are openly insulted in public by their wives. They are rebuked and taunted in front of others and the wives openly laugh at them.

And if that was not enough, these wives use threats to get what they want. They threaten on walking out of the marriage, they threaten of divorce , of filling all kinds of false cases against their husbands. Some women go to a further extent. They put their words in action.One of the most powerful instruments that such manipulative women use is the SILENT TREATMENT. They stop acknowledging the presence of their husbands. They stop avoiding their husbands till the time they come and apologize and meet their demands of their wives.

Another weapon used is the absolute denial of sex or any kind of physical contact knowing how desperate men are for sex.The poor husbands are forced to live the life of a married celibate.

Children and in-laws are further manipulated. These women play the victim card who is always neglected and abused.WOW!! Talk on women's empowerment and you have it.

And of course there are these evil wives who will put their evil thought in action. They will flirt with other men in front of their husbands, knowing how their husbands will burn from inside. Some will even have affairs with other men to put their husbands down. After all it is all about MY CHOICE.

Abuse extends to the level of the financial arena. These wives take full control of their husbands salary while the poor husbands survive on peanuts. These wives end up splurging the hard earned money of their husbands on all kinds of materialistic pursuits.

This is just the tip of the iceberg of the abuse  faced by Indian husbands and I hope after reading this blog post more Indian husbands will share their stories.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day and promise o be back with a lot more

BHAVEEN SHETH

Thursday, July 7, 2016

Bhaveen Sheth-DOTSIM- A marriage that came to an end before the honeymoon period got over

During my visit to Goa, 2 months ago, I went to an Udupi restaurant daily to have breakfast daily. One day while having my breakfast , I observed a couple sitting two tables adjacent to me. Going by their looks, they were in their late 20's or early 30's and had been recently got married because the wife was wearing choora on her forearms and the vermilion on her forehead was clearly marked. But something was odd about that couple.While the man looked okay, the woman was uptight and in a foul mood, there was no smile on her face.. She didn't seem to be happy Now that was really odd about a newly married couple.What had gone wrong? Did the marriage break her expectations?Was it a forced arranged marriage? Was it a loveless marriage that was done just to keep other people happy? I could not understand. But going by experience, I clearly know that this marriage will not last for long. It will either lead to a bitter divorce or lead to the couple living a loveless marriage that has hit a dead end.Both ways it is a failure.

At times I wonder, I wonder why people get into such loveless marriages.It is better to remain single and be happy that to get married to someone you don't love.

The couple was gone by the time I finishes my breakfast but they left me thinking for long.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing off for the day and will be back with a lot more.

BHAVEEN SHETH

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

Bhaveen Sheth-DOTSIMThe high standards of today's modern educated, overdemanding Indian women

Bhaveen Sheth, the writer of this post  writes on the sky high expectations that today's modern Indian women have from a marriage. Due to such high expectations they reject each and every potential alliance. Later they find it difficult to get married and end up living a miserable single life. 

Now a days it is quite normal to read and hear on a number of modern educated urban Indian women who are still single in their 30's and 40's.

While staunch feminists are applauding this growing population of single Indian women, there are many who have stated that such a trend will have  disastrous consequences on women.

So why are many educated working urban Indian women remaining single? The answer  that they state is that they have still not come across the right person. "I am still waiting to find Mr.Perfect:."There are no decent single guys available"."I will not compromise on my standards and marry below my level."

Right guy, perfect guy and high standards. Ohhh man!!!!

I don't know what these women mean when they mention the above written words. At present many women are confused. They are not able to decide. Many still go by the face value or the financial status of the person.

Expectations are all the same. The dream guy should have it all, wealth of Bill Gates, body of Hritik Roshan and charms of Shah Rukh Khan.

And then I would like to ask these women one question, just one question.Are you perfect? I mean, seriously, are you perfect??Just look at yourself in the mirror. For starters look at yourself. No, I will not comment on your physique  because if I do so , I may incur the wrath of the feminists. Do you have that figurine hour glass body? Are you lean? Are you picture perfect? No, you are not!!.

Many such women having high standards are average, just average:average in everything. They have an average intellect, they hold average jobs, they have no major accomplishments. They come from an average family background, the ubiquitous middle class family. But the expectations of these women are sky high. They live in a world of fantasy and think that one Mr.Charming/Mr.Perfect is waiting for them out there in some part of the world.

These women are not getting younger as the days go by. Year after year their chances of getting married are diminishing. The only thing that remains static is their sky high expectations. At present they are in the prime of their youth and think that men in their early and mid 30's are too old for them.They love rejecting potential suitors. For them face value, professional qualifications and remuneration of men are parameters decided when considering someone as their future husbands. Every potential groom is rejected by these women.They get some sort of pleasure in humiliating and taunting potential suitors. Many such women want to convey a message to their parents on their sky high high expectations by rejecting potential suitors.

Frankly speaking, these suitors are not bad. They come from decent families, hold good qualifications and have respectable and well paying jobs. They are the real Indian men, men who are not superficial, men who are real marriage material and qualify to become good husbands and fathers. But just because these good men don't match up to the sky high expectations of these women, they get rejected. Nothing happens to them, they eventually find good women, get happily married and start a family.

But what about our women with sky high expectations??

To tell the caustic and acerbic truth, these women end up being single for the rest of their lives. They cross their 20's and enter into their 30's. They become the leftover women, an of the shelf product, something that has now gone beyond its expiry date. They are no longer sought after in the matrimonial market.This is one harsh reality about the Indian society. No matter how modern and educated we the people of India become;we remain traditional and conservative at the core level. A woman past 30 is not considered desirable. Matrimonial alliances now become hard to come by. The one who used to reject has now become the rejected.Even some alliances that came through family relations have now stopped coming.Now they get alliances from the rejected and dejected men, you know the kind of guys that no one wants to marry, divorcees, widowers, single fathers, physically disabled, fat, obese and what not.

Year after year desperation and frustration rises amongst such women but there is no solution. Peers and colleagues of these women are now happily married and have children of their own.For these single women, a solo life becomes extremely difficult. Feelings of dejection and depression set in. It is now that they realize that they were wrong and wrong indeed.It is now that they look back retrospectively and realize that the men they rejected would have become good husbands and caring fathers of their children, had they married them. But now that time has gone. At present there are just a few suitable and many unsuitable men men available for them, but these women still won't marry because of their sky high expectations that have never changed over the years.

As I conclude the post, I describe the present lives of these women and how it looks. For women who are now in their 20's having high expectations, I request that they should carefully read the following paragraph as it reveals the trials and tribulations of living a single life in India.

The scenario is something like this. There is this single depressed Indian woman, now in her late 30's or early 40's living a miserable life.Her parents have aged and are now worried about  who will take care of their daughter after they die. Her brothers and sisters are now married and happily settled. They have gradually distanced themselves from her. No one invites her to any social function or occasion.Men of all kinds try to hit on her thinking that she is an easy available sex object.She craves and yearns for emotional support but she gets none.Her physical needs and wants remain unfulfilled. She has now become an outcast in her own society, amongst her own people.She returns to an empty house and has her lunch and dinner alone. There are times when she falls sick and there is no one by her side.There are times when she wants speak with someone but there is no one to listen to her. Festivals and birthdays have now stopped being of any importance to her. She has no one forward to look for, nothing to live for. Life has now become a mundane and boring existence.

This is the fate of many such single Indian women who have standards/expectations from marriage.This is the price they eventually pay.

This is Bhaveen Sheth signing out for the and will be back with a lot more.

Bhaveen Sheth