Being single in India has its own challenges. My single status is a question mark to a lot of people.
One of the reasons for being single is the unwillingness to take unwanted responsibilities and the existing anti-male laws in the judicial system of this country. Whenever I speak my mind on these topics or express my opinion, I get labelled as a cynic, negative and depressed person.That does not mean that marriage is a bad institution. Getting married is good, but if a person is not willing to get married, he is labelled as a cynic.
There are many Indian men for whom marriage has turned into a disaster. These men still have bitter memories of their failed marriages and they carry a lot of emotional baggage. Other men had failed relationships, some men come from dysfunctional families, the primary institution of marriage failed them.The bond of holy matrimony failed them.So they decided not to get married. I don't think that they are cynical.
I have clearly stated my case. Being an orphan makes me an outcast and vulnerable.The first thing is that I have found no takers. Secondly, I am well aware of the fact that there are manipulative female opportunists out there who want to get married to me because they have equally found no takers. These women have parents who play the sympathy card to get their daughters married. No just imagine, I have no one to help me in my difficult times:what would happen if I was charged under all those false feminist anti-male laws? Who will help me? I cannot live a life controlled by a woman who is emotionally abusing me 24*7.
Single hood has given me an opportunity to live life on my own terms. In my early 30's, I often see my peers who are living a mundane life.The ubiquitous albatross of home loans and EMI is hanging on their necks along with the Damocles sword of loosing a job.Many have resigned to their fates and are living a mediocre life. They get up , go to work, pay their bills, go home, eat food, watch TV and sleep.When I compare my life with them, I find myself better off. Single life has give me the freedom to do what I want.
No one is right and no one is wrong. Everyone has a different view or perception about a particular situation. A pragmatist always looks at both sides before he/she makes a decision. I have done the same thing and there is nothing wrong with the decision that I have taken.
To all the single Indian men out there,please note that if you are single because of your own choice then you are not a cynic. You are single because you are a pragmatist, so please don't fee sad about it.
The probem with our Indian society is that anyone who does not conform to it norms, rules and regulations is dubbed as a cynic.
This Bhaveen Sheth singing out and will be back with a lot more.
Bhaveen Sheth
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