Why do I have my profile active on a matrimonial site: Bhaveen Sheth-DOTSIM-Indian MGTOW

Many of you readers who are following this blog visiting it regularly would be thinking that why as a veteran MGTOW and single Indian man has his profile active on shaadi.com. I can understand. As a veteran MGTOW and as a man who has now  addicted to his solitude, marriage may not be possible.

However whenever I meet people, I am asked why I am single? To the majority I clearly state the gender biased laws and rising levels of gynocentrism and feminazism. However those who are close to me are clearly told that I am an adult orphan having no family of my own. My best friends are my family.

For over last 10 years I have been told that some decent family will always like me or a good hearted girl will choose me. After all it is the person that matters. However I know the reality. In our nation and society orphans have a difficult life ahead. Their lives are lonely and struggles are difficult.

In 2015, I had deleted my profile on matrimonial sites, however in 2016, on the insistence of a friend, I reactivated my profile. This time it was purely experimental as I wanted to witness the stark realities and dubious standards of the society.

And my assumption turned into reality. People saw my profile repeatedly and did not express interests, those who did, wanted a bio-data and some reference from my blood relatives, this in spite of writing that I don't have a family. The so called modern single independent woman or those who claimed to be that stated that she would discuss with her own family and she expressed apprehension. Some parents and sibling considered me as the Hobson's choice/last alternative where they could just dump their daughter/sister on me in order to fulfill their responsibility. I could understand their reasons, a daughter/sister will limited prospects to get married, normal families not accepting her alliance, finding some simple beta male who would just marry and keep the daughter with no questions asked, escaping from the taunts, jibes and criticism of having an aged unmarried daughter still sitting at home.

Even as I write this post, my profile is repeatedly visited, sometimes interests are expressed and nothing moves ahead. Of course it does not affect me at all. Marriage is not on my priority list. But I wanted to closely observe the society. Profile views and invitations are an experience. It confirms my assumptions about the bias, prejudice and double standards that people carry. It also shows the massive high standards and uncompromising beliefs that people have.

I am not here to criticize or pass judgement on anyone. Unfortunately people don't stop judging or having a poor thinking for orphans or people who don't have parents. Even at the age of 40, I am treated like a naive 25 year old boy. In India, people are not used to see men standing up for themselves, taking major life responsibilities and being independent. Time and again I hear this common statement "Beta (son), We need to talk to some elder in you family"? How can you take such an important decision all by yourself? Years back I would give an explanation. These days, I just hang up and delete and block their profiles. With age, I don't have the energy to engage in bullshit with toxic and judgmental people. And mind you these are people who have a 35  year old unmarried daughter and yet treat me like some low class servant. These experiences have shown me the miserable treatment that orphans go through just because they don't have parents or a family. Insults, humiliations and bad treatment.

But then I don't care. I have very well accepted my fate and destiny and intend to move forward. I have kept my profile active just to see some stark realities and share my experience with fellow single Indian men and MGTOWs.

Bhaveen Sheth

Indian MGTOW

It is better to return to an empty house rather have an abusive, toxic and nagging spouse: Bhaveen Sheth-Indian MGTOW

As a single Indian man having lived alone for the last 22 years of my life, I often get asked on how do I come back to an empty house with no one to greet me. How do I manage to live in a house all on my own? To this, I answer that it is better to come back to an empty house rather than have an emotionally abusive, toxic and nagging wife in the house who just treats you like a doormat.

Emotional abuse of married Indian men is a topic that is hardly ever discussed. A lot of married Indian men put up with emotional and physical abuse at the hands of their wives for the sake of their children and society. No married Indian man will ever confess that he is facing emotional abuse and violence due to family reputation and shame. The recent case of Hollywood actor Johnny Depp and Amber Heard highlights the topic of husband's emotional abuse.

I am often asked why I still don't try to get married? At least give it a chance! I just listen and get on with I am doing not bothering at the opinion of people. At this age, solitude and mental peace is all that I want. Solo life and loneliness has made me realize the importance of emotional health. How peaceful is to just be your own self and not having  to live up to the standards of the society. 

I often tell post 30 single Indian men looking for marriage or even the ones in their mid and late 20s to introspect their decision on getting married. I am certainly not against marriage but i advise Indian men to strongly evaluate and analyze their choice of a life partner. It is easy to be blinded and influenced by beauty, looks, fair skin and a good figure. Many Indian men do not see the red flags or rather are not made to see the same considering the fact that in arranged marriages, the women put up their best behaviour.

I have written a write up on emotionally abused husbands in my blog.You may please read the same in order to get a better perspective. 

Our society has rapidly changed in the last 2 decades. Barring the super rich high class, the responsibility of being a provider, protector and caregiver lies with the Indian man. He is indoctrinated with this philosophy since his childhood. Thirty years ago just having a job and bringing salary was the only expectation from the man. Today he is supposed to buy a minimum 2 BHK, a mid segment car, have an annual package of seven figure salary. All this because of comparison and false glorification on social media. Today's new age women expect all the previously mentioned things from a potential spouse as if it were their constitutional right. Now what happens when the expectations of the woman keeps growing even after marriage and the man in spite of all his efforts is not able to live up to her so called dreams and expectations? The answer is comparing with other successful men, nagging, taunts, jibes and emotional abuse.

The last decade has has strongly influenced women, thanks to the easy access to internet and social media. More and more women are having an extreme sense of entitlement and have turned into woke, leftist liberal pseudo feminists. They want all amenities and facilities without really working hard for it. False feminist narratives written by leftist liberals have brainwashed them into thinking that they are a special and a privileged lot. Many of them are not even rooted to their own culture or religion. The current eco-system especially the one seen on social media  only focuses on looks, beauty and fan following. Hence it is not a surprise to see young women making dancing and lip syncing videos on social media just to gain validation and increase followers. Some of them are posting enticing digitally edited photographs in order to gain popularity on social media. Now these girls lack basic life skills including cooking,housekeeping and laundry. For them everything happens at a click of a button through the various apps (zomato, swiggy, big basket). Some are so over pampered by their parents that they can't face the realities of the outside world while others who belong to separated homes develop an intense hatred for their fathers. Some of them are so emotionally messed up that they require psychiatric counselling. Please read this paragraph carefully to get a real insight into what can ruin your life if you oversee the red flags.

When these women reach a marriagable age, their parents look for a suitable match. When presented through online matrimonial apps or family arranged meetings, the men are easily charmed by beauty and looks. Something that should be obnoxious is easily liked by men and found acceptable. Six months into marriage the true colours of the woman come out and then starts the cycle of emotional abuse. 

Today even at 40, I am asked told that there are so many 30 plus single women out there and I should give marriage a chance. I have seen and met many of them and let me tell you,  that barring a few, many of these women have extremely high standards when it comes to a life partner, some of them are still living is a dream world thinking that their charming prince is going to come for them.Others behave like teenagers even after crossing 30. Many of them are not emotionally capable for marriage. Some just want to get married because they want to move out of their parental homes, tired of constant nagging by parents(for being single after30) and being treated as maid by their brothers and sister in laws. Others just want to gain a marital status as they feel left out considering all their friends have gotmarried. Now tell me what happens when marriage just becomes a compromise or an adjustment?

Single Indian men must understand that not getting married is not the end of your life. If you are taking good care of your parents and financially supporting them, then you are doing your dharma of Lord Ram or Shravan. Times have changed and you have an easy access to all kinds of entertainment or engagement. You can go to coffee shops or bars. You can attend book fairs and film festivals, explore new dine outs in your city, catch with your school and college friends. Finally when you come home, you can catch up on reading, your favorite movies and web-series streaming on different platforms, upskill yourself and a lot more.

Today at 40, I look forward to coming back to my home. A strong black coffee awaits me. There is peace and solitude. I am not nagged or criticized. I refuse to live up to the set expectations of another women who is living in my house without contributing anything substantial. I am no longer willing to confirm to the materialistic standards of our society that just believes in splurging money on expensive homes, cars and parties. Where the hell did the concept of minimalism go?

Hence I end this post by stating that it is better to come back to an empty house than to a toxic, nagging and abusive spouse. I sympathize the younger men who are getting married or in the process of getting married. God only knows what they will go through after six months of getting married.

Bhaveen Sheth

Indian MGTOW

Remembering all those humiliating and insulting matrimonial meetings: Bhaveen Sheth-Indian MGTOW

I like to write down and share my own experiences on the insulting and humiliating matrimonial meetings that I have faced during my 20s and 30s. I was then a young indealistic guy, fresh out in the world after completing my post graduation and starting a new job. Like all men of my age I dreamt of getting married and starting a family of my own.

Little did I know what was in store for me, I used to think that being a self made man would make me looked upon as a respectable person but that was not the case. In our country people judge you based on your family background. It is what defines you as a person. Sadly I did not have any. Being an adult orphan , with no family to represent me, put me in a difficult position.

The parents of potential brides judged me, my integrity, morals, behaviour and character. No one was willing to consider me, I guess they had trust issues. What is your background? Where is the rest of your family? How can we give away our daughter to a man who does not have any family? You must be a fraud?  Don't you have anyone from your family to represent you? How is that possible? 

What I did not understand is why did these people agree to speak to me or meet me in the first place when I had clearly stated everything about my background? 

I also got matrimonial interests from women whom no would marry. I believe they were a Hobson's choice. They were not getting a match from a so called suitable or decent families and they only had me as a choice. I guess in India , orphans have no options.

In my early 30s, I decided to live a single life. By the time I turned  34, the MGTOW movement had come to India and the JIO Internet blitzkring took place in 2016. More and more single Indian men started connecting with each other online and shared the benefits of MGTOW lifestyle. I found joy in taking up the MGTOW lifestyle. My involvement in men's rights activism and subsequent talks with aggrieved men fighting matrimonial disputes/cases made me realize that marriage in India was just a sham.

Today, I am extremely happy at the lifestyle decision I made.I look back over the years and laugh that those meetings, yes they were insulting and humiliating but it was good that marriage never happened. It also made me realize how materialistic people are in the Indian society. While forging an alliance with people , they are only looking for their own long term benefits.

This was my experience and I thought of sharing the same. I will also be writing a post on the humiliations that today's men face during matrimonial meetings.

Bhaveen Sheth

Indian MGTOW

India's doormat husbands-Bhaveen Sheth-Indian MGTOW

We all have heard about doormat boyfriends.As matured men now in our 30s and 40s we would have observed during our college days how some boys would go around doing simping for the girls they liked. They would take them on dates, movies, recharge their mobile phones, xerox their notes and do all other sundry jobs that the girls wanted. But these men remained friends only friends, nothing happened beyond that. Majority of these men felt used after some point of time. They were nothing other than doormat boyfriends aka beta simps.

Some years later this trend is repeated again.Many of these men are now accomplished on their professional front and it is time for them to get married.As usual the search for a suitable bride starts and the search is narrowed down to that one special person who is fair and good looking.Marriage is solemnized and a new chapter begins.

A few years later this man has  become a classical case of a doormat husband.He is nothing more than a 24/7 ATM, protector and provider. He is supposed to take care of his wife and kids, pay all the bills and facilitate a luxurious lifestyle for the wife and kids, pay the EMI's, car loans, home loans and school fees, sponsor the annual vacations and also take care of all the in-laws.

Now what does this man get in return. Nothing!!! Other than those lovely initial months of intimacy after marriage there is nothing. Some men are now denied intimacy. The wife has now gone to the gym and become a yummy mummy. As she is getting a lot of attention from other men she now now no longer values her husband, some of them are even having affairs with other men while having their luxurious lifestyle being taken care of by the husband. Just like how they boyfriend used to do all the sundry jobs for his crush now it is the husband sponsoring the luxurious lifestyle of his wife but does not get anything in return. He has no value, no respect and no honour. This is a reality that our society does not discuss but its exists. The problem is such husbands do not want to accept that they are doormat husbands.

Bhaveen Sheth

INDIAN MGTOW

Happy New Year 2022-From the Indian MGTOW's Desk

I would like to wish a very happy new year for all my fellow single Indian men and fellow MGTOW's. I hope you all would have enjoyed and celebrated the 31st night. The year 2021 went so fast. What started as a new beginning of supposedly having won over COVID gradually became a major disaster. The months between April to July were worse. The incompetence and failure of the government was clearly visible. So many people lost their loved ones. The sad part is that the events of this year left so many COVID orphans who are left to their own fate. Once again businesses have suffered and men have lost their jobs.

In the current times staying single and living a MGTOW lifestyle is the best option. Even if you face financial problems, it is only you who will bear the consequences and not your family members. Imagine the guilt of not being able to pay EMI's, children's school fees and meeting your household expenses. In an article written by Mr.Rahul Pandita, an eminent journalist, he shared his own personal experience;he had visited a grocery shop and a decent well educated man met him. This man asked Rahul Pandita if he could buy some essential groceries for this man as he had lost his job, spent all savings and had no money to buy food for his family, this man had a 1 year child and was desperate to get some food for his child. Mr.Rahul offered some money but this man only asked Rahul to buy him essential groceries. I guess his self respect did not make him take money from another person.

Imagine if any one of us were in this situation. How humiliating is it to beg in front of someone for basic essentials for your family. I guess I too cannot do such a thing. I would rather starve than beg.

As stated in my previous posts, don't change your mind due to this pandemic situation. I know that these are difficult times, our loved ones are dying and there is a need for companionship. But I want to clearly warn you, please don't get married. Marriages done due to desperation often lead to disaster.

This year please focus on improving yourself, go to the gym, exercise, run, lift weights, go for a swim. Focus on health and wellness. Mental and emotional health is equally important. Take up yoga and meditation. Read spiritual books and visit temples on a regular basis. Travel as much as you can in India, explore new places.On you tube there are many food channels that are exploring good eateries in your city. Please visit and eat the food at these places. It is wonderful.

I have already warned you on legal terrorism related to marriage. I also want to warn to on the new and emerging crime that no one is talking: SEXTORTION. We have have already heard about Ms. Ayushi Bhatia, this woman who filled 7 false rape cases against 7 men in the year 2021 itself. I will be writing about her in my coming posts, but please be warned. If you are meeting an unknown woman in a public place who is getting extra friendly with you then it is a red flag. Just avoid such women. Another scam observed is where an unknown woman sends you a friend request on facebook or Instagram, once you accept this request, she will have a video call with you and try to get personal on the call. She will start revealing her physically and while the man may be enjoying, his act is being recorded by the woman. Later this woman will send a threatening message stating that the video will be made viral if the man will not pay up the money demanded by her. There are instances where in the video is shared with the friends and family members of this man on social media.

Our society is headed towards moral decadence. There are no values, no moral and no ethics. I request all my fellow MGTOW brothers to stay out of any trouble.

This year I am also willing to help my fellow MGTOWs especially the young ones who are looking for wise counsel or advice on living a MGTOW/Single Life.My email is is sheth.bhaveen@gmail.com

Once again I wish you all a very happy new year and let us hope that this year brings peace and prosperity to all of us.

Bhaveen Sheth

Indian MGTOW

Not being part of the Indian Society's Rat Race:Bhaveen Sheth-Indian MGTOW

One of the prime benefits that comes with being single and living a MGTOW lifestyle is that you are no longer a part of the rat race of the Indian society. We have all heard about the rat race in corporate organizations but no one speaks on the rat race of the Indian society. This is an inconvenient truth, a taboo that we don't want to discuss.

The society's rat race is visible during family gatherings and social functions. As a man you are compared with other men based on your marriage, how beautiful your wife is, the type of car you own, the apartment you live in, annual vacations, your job, salary, promotion, kids and a whole lot of things.

There are times when this kind of comparison leads to jealousy, resentment and disappointment within men. Not everyone is a successful corporate professional, not everyone is earning a hefty package of 2 Lakhs per month. And still comparison has no end.

When you decide to be single and follow the MGTOW lifestyle, you are away from this society rat race. As you are single you hardly get invited to any social gatherings. And once you become a veteran MGTOW, you yourself start avoiding these otherwise unwanted functions. Profession and job takes you away from your home city hence your contact with relatives is limited. No one compares you or criticizes you. You don't have to please anyone. You are working to make your life better and become a better person than you were yesterday. You are at peace with yourself.

This is one of the less discussed but most important benefits of being MGTOW. Remember this folks. It may help you in taking an important life decision wisely.

Indian men's lives matter-Bhaveen Sheth-DOTSIM-Indian MGTOW

Taking inspiration from the Black Lives Matter movement from the USA, I write on why Indian men's lives matter. Truth be stated that the lives of Indian men are dirt cheap, cheaper than the life of a street mongrel.

No one cares what happens to men especially Indian men. The Gynocentric media is more concerned with the issues of women. And yet I as the writer of this blog would like to state that the lives of Indian men do matter.

Our  child hood does matter. A topic that is hardly discussed, but we all know the pressures put upon today's young boys. The pressure of achieving good grades, performance in  extra curricular activities, validation from the group, expectations of parents and that coveted status of being hooked and having a girlfriend. The burden to prove something is huge and still I say that the lives of these young boys matter.

We all know in the year 2020, a bright young teenager was pushed to commit suicide based on a fake social media post by a leftist feminazi woman accusing and shaming the young boy of molesting her which was a figment of her imagination. All  she wanted was some sympathy and social media likes,  this claimed the life of a young boy. The matter is in court and subjudice. But what about the parents who lost their only son.

The lives of young men who are in their prime does matter. Hundreds and thousands of Indian men have become burdened by expectations: Job, Salary,  designation, corporate culture, moving away from homes, owning a vehicle , property , fitting into a group, peer group pressure. Adding to this is the pressure of getting married and starting a new life and meeting the expectations of the partner.

In the later years of life more stress and pressure adds up. It is part of life and one cannot change it. But then all men have to right of a life filled with dignity and respect. Unfortunately many men do not get this. They are badly treated by their girlfriends and wives , sometimes even their own parents behave badly with them.

Men suffer silently, they don't cry in public or share their grievances with anyone. Over the years they become stoical and accept emotional abuse and suffering as a part of their lives.

As a veteran MGTOW , I empathize with my fellow Indian men and would like to state that your life  does matter. Remember you have your own importance in this world and never allow anyone to treat you badly. Protect your self esteem and dignity. Understand the importance of your own life. Your life matters. 

Bhaveen Sheth

Indian MGTOW

What is wrong in expecting your future spouse/wife to be a home maker:Bhaveen Sheth-Indian MGTOW-DOTSIM

We are living in times of leftist liberal feminazi cancel culture combined with a snow flake generation that is equally hyper sensitive even to listen to another person's point of view.

The topic of a homemaker always leads to heated arguments. The leftist liberals are always in arms if a man says that he wants his future spouse to be a home maker. I mean don't we have a thriving democracy in our country where freedom of expression and choice of lifestyle in the the basic fundamental right of each and every individual? Expectation of what a future spouse should be  an individual choice.

Our so called leftist liberals have run a false narrative for the last 20 years stating that house work is slavery, unpaid labour that never gets compensated and exploitation of women. They want all women to abandon housework and go to work in offices. 

Now I am all for women's empowerment and believe in equality but not all women have equal opportunities in terms of education and career opportunities, not all women are blessed with a high level of intellect or motor skills that allows them to compete equally in today's workforce. Some women just  manage  to complete graduation and some undertake post graduation, however many of them end up with entry level positions in the job market. Again nothing wrong with that. 

But then are there jobs where career growth and progression is guaranteed? Do these jobs give satisfaction? This is a question that is difficult to answer. Thirty years ago young girls were sent to undertake home science classes so that it would prepare them to become good home makers and again it was not regressive. We were a closed economy with a socialist culture. Jobs were not easy to come and  the men  used to work and women used to take care of the home and children.

Things changed, in 1991 our economy opened up and many jobs were created. Along with this a leftist liberal narrative was put through in print media and Television on Indian women being forcibly put at homes after marriage and being asked to give up their careers.Let me tell you this was a false propaganda. Time and again the Indian society has supported its women in terms of their career choice. Many women have chosen to work after getting married and husbands and in-laws have permitted it.

Now let us come to the main topic. What is wrong if a man who earns a good salary expects his future spouse to be a home maker? What is wrong if he expects his wife to cook for him and look after his home and children? Is it a crime? Why then is he labeled as a male chauvinistic pig and called regressive?  I am sure an Indian man is not looking for that B-School IIM pass out who is working hard in the corporate world and wants to climb the ladder as soon as possible, he is not looking for a scientist working in ISRO or DRDO. He is just looking for a simple women who is a graduate or post graduate. He is looking for a homely women. Now is he is earning more that Rs 50,000 , why does he need to have a wife who will work? I mean, if she is also earning Rs 40,000, maybe it is contributing to the  household expenses, but, is she is earning just Rs 15 K to Rs 20 K, what is the point of doing a job? I mean just look, she will be spending a good amount of money in just travelling considering the rising fuel prices. With rising competition, today's workplaces are filled with targets and goals, life is stressful and again you cannot leave your workplace at 5 pm, you have to stretch beyond office hours. Is it worth?

A homemaker is a blessing to the family. She can take good care of her children, in-laws and the house. I myself have come across many such home makers who may be just HSC pass or graduates but are street smart. They are extremely skillful in managing homes, they can negotiate prices with the vegetable seller, find the best home equipments from local markets and cook delicious meals. The Covid pandemic and lockdown clearly showed how important home making skills were, many of these educated working women who used to look down upon home makers found it difficult to manage their kitchens without their maids and cooks. This is the importance of a homemaker.

So then why do people get offended when someone expects his future wife to be a home maker? It is his choice. Is he expecting  his female colleague to give up her job and become a homemaker? NO!!! Then why do people get offended? The answer lies in the glorification of a false narrative and brainwashing two generations. The so called journalists of NDTV and their counter parts run debates and talk shows on prime time showing how regressive the concept of a home maker/housewife is. Believe me these journalists(being women) don't even know how to make a simple meal at their homes and are fully dependent on their maids. All they know is just to talk and shriek in English. They are after all the Macaulay Putris who behave like those anglicized mems of the British Raj. With their false propaganda they brainwash an entire generation. 

Let me share an example with you. When it comes to buying a car, the majority in India prefer a car that falls into their budget. People prefer a Maruti Alto , Hyundai Santro, Renault Kwid or Tata Tiago. All these models fall into the budget of middle class or upper class. Now will brands like BMW, Mercedes, Audi or Ford get offended and try to shut down the car brands that cater to the needs of the middle class?No they won't. Because they know their market segment and their customers. So why do these so called feminists get offended?

The answer is because they know that contrary to what they think, men don't want to marry them because of their strong feminist ideology. When men go for lesser educated women who are willing to take care of the home, these women become angry, because somewhere they realize that they cannot mange their own homes without the help and support of their maids and cooks. If these women are married, their husbands are beta male simps who don't mind washing up the dishes, so these women feel that all husbands should also behave like beta male simps. Many of these women are either unmarried of separated. Even if matrimonial alliances come their way, the expectation is that of a home maker and for some reason they get rejected. Now they feel that every other women should not be a home maker.

I clearly remember a few years back, Ms. Mira Rajput, the wife of actor Shahid Kapoor had made the following statement:

The new wave of feminism is aggressive and destructive. There is a term called 'feminazi' which is now becoming the female equivalent of a male chauvinist."

"I am a housewife and wear that label with pride," Mira Rajput added, "Why can't you be an accomplished homemaker? Accomplishing could mean anything one has their heart set on. I had a tough pregnancy, bringing Misha (seven-month-old daughter) into this world. Now, I love being at home and spending time with my child. I don't want to spend an hour with her and then rush to work. It's not that I am not a woman of today. You don't have to compromise on traditions and ideals to be modern."

Now this statement triggered the feminazi brigade to such an extent that they went online trolling and bashing Ms.Mira Rajput. They didn't even spare a woman. This is their level of toxicity.

Child care is important. And if a man wants his spouse to be a home maker, he has every right to it. His thought process should not be questioned. What is the point of doing a job that pays you Rs 15-20 K in a metro city? What is the point of having an education when one does not have any career progression or growth path? The life in today's organizations is filled with stress and tension. Is it worth it? While the leftist liberals don't want women to be home makers, many surveys have repeatedly stated that women are more happy  being at homes and taking care of their families.

Any man reading this post should not be ashamed if he wants his future spouse to be a home maker.

I rest my case.

MGTOW Lifestyle and freedom from obligations, expectations and burdens of the Indian Society-Bhaveen Sheth-Indian MGTOW

By the time you reach your late 30's, you realize that you have made the right decision by taking up and following the MGTOW Lifestyle. Many people have criticized me for running away from basic responsibilities. When I ask what were the the responsibilities and I get a reply of not getting married or having a family of my own. I have stopped caring nowadays.

You see, in India , if you are a man you are always expected to meet certain expectations, fulfill obligations and have many burdens dumped upon you for no reason. All this is okay till you finish your college and start earning but then why does society push us further? Why are we forced into getting married?

Now I am no expert to answer this question. To each one his own and I am better off minding my own business. Marriage in India puts lots of responsibilities on men. Unlike the West, you don't marry an individual, you marry the entire family and hence you become a part of a larger society. Two individuals can remain happy but to make 2 entire families happy is no easy task. 

Once you get married, your expenditure sky rockets, after having a child, a man faces major challenges. Healthcare and Education take a huge toll on one's income. Even after 70 years of independence, basic services like education and healthcare are in a pathetic state. This has lead to privatization of these services where even the lower middle class people are forced to avail the same. 

When you live in a society, you are expected to meet the so called standards set by it. Having a house, a car, attending social functions of the larger family and friends, giving out gifts, celebrating birthdays and anniversaries, dinning out a expensive restaurants on weekends, vacations in India and abroad and rest of the things.

At 39, I am so happy of not being a part of this so called circus. I don't have to spend money on worthless things just to meet someones expectations.

This my friends are the real benefits of following a MGTOW lifestyle in India. So if you have chosen the path of MGTOW but are not sure about it,believe me, this is are the true words of a 39 year old veteran MGTOW. Go ahead and live your life, away from the burdens and expectations of the Indian society.

Why do so many distressed married men and divorced/separated Indian men commit suicide: Bhaveen Sheth-DOTSIM-Indian MGTOW

Now that I am extremely comfortable with my MGTOW lifestyle, I try to look into a very interesting and neglected fact of our society on the reasons why so may married and divorced Indian men commit suicide in India. 

A normal web search on google throws up the following links:

Times of India:

Married men twice as likely to commit suicide than married w ..

Read more at:

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/articleshow/48220552.cms?utm_source=contentofinterest&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=cppst

Daman:

NCRB – Suicides: India Lost 97613 sons in 2019

https://www.daaman.org/post/ncrb-suicides-india-lost-97613-sons-in-2019

The Wire:

Reporter's Diary: Looking At Male Suicides in India

https://thewire.in/culture/reporters-diary-male-suicides-india

Scroll:

Married men are most likely to commit suicide in India

https://scroll.in/article/669061/married-men-are-most-likely-to-commit-suicide-in-india

If one actually goes through these articles,  all of them other than Daman (Men's Rights Website) puts the blame on patriarchy, toxic masculinity and mental health problems of men. Most of these media portals are runs by feminist and feminazi groups that have just have an agenda to spread a false narrative.

Blaming men for all problems is a time and tested tactic of the media. We all saw what happened in Sushant Singh Rajput murder case during the initial days when the left liberal media was shouting on mental health issues and how the same had afflicted Sushant Singh Rajput. Today the story has taken a different turn. However I don't want to shift focus on my topic, so let us discuss it.

In my opinion most of the Indian men have put the institution of  marriage on a pedestal. Most of these men live in a delusional world thinking that they will get the world's most loving and caring women not to mention beautiful.The aspiration for a wonderful married life starts when a man is his late teens. Relentless brainwashing through Bollywood movies and the society conditions most of the Indian men to live in a dream world wherein they loose focus with the ground reality.

Even in today's times of of Hoe and Thot culture, the men expect to have a holy than thou sacred wife who is pure. Yes such women do exist but they are a minority. The most....... well you all know what the truth is. 

Most of Indian men struggle and work extremely hard in order to achieve a good education and job, the single most important requirement to live a decent and respectable life in India. This is also a ticket to become an eligible bachelor in India's matrimonial aka MEAT market. After all an Indian is just worth of his annual CTC and sum total of his assets.

Haven't we heard the wisdom given by our elders "If you don't study and get a job, you will not get a wife and will remain unmarried" HAHAHHAA. I really laugh at this statement. But jokes apart, most men who have started on a successful career path think that they will get married and live a happy life ever after. No one really thinks what would happen if the marriage fails and things don't work out.

So here is what actually happens. Once the ceremonies are completed, the honeymoon is over and the couple gets back to their daily lives, the reality sets in and it hits extremely hard. The wife states that she did not want to marry the man in the first place, did it due to parental pressure and society, there is a boyfriend/lover from the past who comes from nowhere and the affair starts, the wife's parents interfere a lot trying to extract their pound of flesh from the groom, the husband isforced to fulfill the expensive demands of the wife that forces him to take EMI's, Car Loans and Home loans, many husbands go through a repetitive  never ending cycle of emotional abuse from their wives that destroys their self esteem. Things don't  stabilize even after having a child, the problems multiply exponentially.

And then the  tragedy strikes. The wife and her parents go to the police and the courts leveling all kinds of fake allegations against the husband. I guess this is the last nail in the coffin or the last straw that breaks the husband's back. The man and his family are declared  criminals just because they did not accede to the demands of the wife and her parents. Later the court cases take the toll on the man where he is shamed and has to face ignominy. Divorce cases end up in settlement wherein lakhs of rupees are paid as a one time separation cost, in some cases monthly alimony and child support is also paid. Many women alienate their children from their biological father. The father yearns to meet the child and yet he is denied basic visitation rights. Imagine what a man would go through if he is not able to meet and love his own child?

As humans we all get betrayed, sometimes by out neighbors, sometimes colleagues and even our friends but that is part and parcel of our lives, people change as per situations. However it is difficult for men when their own wives betray them, when they taunt and abuse them, when they file false criminal charges against them, when they take away their son/daughter and do not allow the men to meet their children. I guess this is what breaks them mentally and emotionally and then they decide to end their lives.

It should be noted that in the current era it is foolish to have expectations from someone and  be emotionally attached. There are evil manipulators all around. Indian men must start thinking rationally and logically. Having sky high expectations from a marriage is like making your own path for destruction. It is time that Indian men start realizing that marriage is not really worth the effort, be it financial or emotional. If marriage is solely based based on the job and salary of the man then problems are bound to erupt after marriage. It is time for Indian men to realize that they should not rush into a marriage just because they are at the right age. You can marry anytime you want provided you find an understanding partner. Stop wasting your time and resources after an institution that is based of lies and false promises.

This is my understanding of the reasons why married Indian men commit suicide. 

Bhaveen Sheth

Indian MGTOW

Stop judging people who have left their dysfunctional families: Bhaveen Sheth-DOTSIM-INDIAN MGTOW

Sometime back I had came across a  post wherein the Head of an Organization refused to hire a person who had cut off  ties with his family (parents and siblings). He said a person who cannot get along with his family and manage family relationships is not fit to work in an organization. Years back when I was doing my post graduation, one of my colleagues who was part of my circle made a statement that a person who is not attached to his/her own family cannot be trusted.

This is the problem with our country, just like marriage, family is considered to be a holy and pious  institution lacking any flaws. There is no concept of dysfunctional family as we the people of India do not believe in such things. Every family is good and there are no problems in it whatsoever. People hardly talk about dysfunctional families. After all we are a society of denial.

My profession and my travels across India has made me realize that there are major problems within Indian families, just no one wants to mention it. I understand that it is a personal choice. 

However what if someone wants to move away from such a toxic dysfunctional family and start a new life elsewhere? What if someone realizes that his/her family is dysfunctional and chooses to move out? What if someone decided to just leave such a dysfunctional family for his/her betterment? Is it wrong? Why are they ostracized?

I often read articles on how women should walk out of bad marriages and live a happy life, how a bad marriage of even 2 years leaves emotional scars upon the woman. If moving out of a dysfunctional marriage is considered as empowerment and liberation then why is leaving a dysfunctional family considered a taboo?

Does anyone actually know what happens within a dysfunctional family? How difficult is it to stay even for one day and tolerate tantrums of family members who have major emotional issues? I guess it is not easy to relate to this? Only a person from a toxic dysfunctional family will understand what goes on and what kind of emotional roller ride it is? 

There are major issues in such families starting with a couple that is never compatible with each other. Forced into marriage due to family pressure and endure a dead end dysfunctional marriage in order to comply with the norms of the society is a common case. Such couples even have children as they have to show the proof of their masculinity and femininity to the world. Children born in these families are at the receiving end of the family toxicity. Combine this with narrow minded elderly patriarchs and matriarchs living in the family who are the followers, defenders and enforcers of traditional values, norms and customs that they think are necessary to be passed on and enforced on each and every generation. Passing on good manners, culture, values and etiquette is not wrong but enforcing your own personality and dominating the lives of other by curbing their freedom is not acceptable. Everyone wants autonomy to do what they want and as they please.  

Then there are those toxic families who have a problem with the entire world. Seems like that they cannot tolerate anyone outside their family circle. They judge and criticize each and everyone, they fight with all their neighbors for no reason. No one wants to be associate with such a family. Such families do not know how to live normally within a community, they get ostracized and ridiculed. 

Any child growing up in such families faces major problems related to self esteem, confidence and ability to negotiate in the world outside their homes. They are often the prisoners to their own thoughts and prejudices that have been inculcated in them by years of upbringing and conditioning. It is not easy to adjust with the outside world. Children from these families are often ridiculed and looked upon with derision and contempt. These children find it difficult to adjust with normal people.

So long as these children are associated with their dysfunctional families they will not be able to become sane adults. The ones with wisdom realize that its is necessary to move away from their toxic families if they want to start a normal life. For those who stay back and remain with their dysfunctional families, life is not good. They become a replica of their own dysfunctional parents or family members finding it difficult to adjust with the normal world.

I just want to ask anyone who is reading this post "What is wrong if someone leaves his/her toxic dysfunctional family?" " What is wrong if someones severs relationships with family members who are acerbic?" We come across so many corporate coaches and motivational speakers who give long speeches on avoiding negative people and staying away from them as it is detrimental to an individual's progress, then why no one talks about toxic dysfunctional families?

The feminist media empowers divorce and separation by stating that women should not waste their best years by staying with a wrong person then why should a normal person stay with a dysfunctional family even for a day.

Millions of childhoods have been ruined, careers and marriages destroyed due to toxic dysfunctional families. It is time for anyone reading this post to seriously introspect. Every individual has a right to live a dignified life, a life filled with joy and happiness and he/ she can chose it individually. 

Judging a person on his/her family background is not right. Everyone has a story and we should learn to respect a person. Everyone is fighting his/her own  battles, the least that we can do is empathize and try to understand. People are products of their circumstances and the situations that they have faced. 

People who leave their dysfunctional families in order to have a better and peaceful start are strong, capable and independent decision makers. They have the courage to face the world on their own and there is nothing that will stop them. Learn to accept such people. In today's times this is the new normal.

Bhaveen Sheth

Wisdom from Swami Sivananada Sarawati on living a MGTOW Life: Bhaveen Sheth

I came across a post on a popular MGTOW group where screenshots from a book written by Swami Sivananda Sarawati. He gives wisdom to men in not getting married and remaining single for life. Please view the posts below:

All single Indian men must read this understand the reality.

Bhaveen Sheth

Indian MGTOW

My dear single Indian men, believe me, marriage is not worth it: Bhaveen Sheth-Indian MGTOW

Greetings from the Indian MGTOW!!!

I hope you all are doing well. Please be safe and protect  yourself. The pandemic is getting severe and cases are rising day by day.

Today's post is exclusively dedicated  to my young readers, men between 25-30 and above who are in a dilemma to get married. There must be a lot pressure on you, be it peer, family or society. But take this advice, an advice from a 38 year old veteran MGTOW, marriage is not worth it, not in today's times of radical feminism and militant feminazism.

You may be thinking a lot. You must be having a dream of having that destination wedding, a luxurious honeymoon, a beautiful married life and most important , a loving and caring partner but believe me it is just not worth it. Loving and  caring partner is a myth. It does not exist, please don't fool yourself. You must be looking at the social media posts of your friends who are happily married and be thinking that one day you too will find you soul mate. Social media is big lie, a distortion of reality. 

Have you asked yourself why you are in demand? Because you are young and in your prime. You have an education and a good degree, a well paying job in a good organization, you are rising in your career and you have a good designation. What if you did not have all this? I guess even the street dog would have never asked for you.

And still there is more that you have to do if you are to get married. You need to buy a house of your own, even buy a car because today's entitled princesses demand it. This will be followed by a dream wedding and an expensive honeymoon for which you will have to sacrifice two or three months salary. Maybe you will have to maintain an expensive lifestyle after getting married because your madamji wife wants it.

Is it worth??? I guess not. Ask what value addition is the woman bringing in your life other than her good looks and fair skin. Can she take care of the home? Can she cook? Can she clean? Can she do the laundry or manage groceries? Is she accommodating? Can she live a simple lifestyle?

All the above questions are difficult to answer. But why make a major lifestyle change if there is no value addition? Why spend a lot money to meet the demands and fulfills the dreams of another person who will never respect and appreciate you?

At the age of 38 I have come across numerous men who are stuck in dysfunctional and dead end marriages. They are not happy. Why do you want to make your life miserable? Do you want to become like them?

Live single, live alone and follow the MGTOW lifestyle. In the journey of life if you come across someone who is compatible and understands you, you can get married. Your choice. However at this moment just don't get married just because everyone is getting married. It is not worth it.

Bhaveen Sheth

INDIAN MGTOW

Whatsapp Group of my UG Batchmates-Bhaveen Sheth DOTSIM-Indian MGTOW

This COVID-19 Pandemic has made many people slow down  their otherwise hectic lives. The lock down imposed in many countries has forced people to sit in their homes and look into their lives. This is a time where people have thought of catching up with old friends, school and college classmates.

Hence an idea came in the minds of one of my UG batch mates to create a group of all college mates for the year 2000 or what I would call the millennium batch. Initially I was reluctant to share my number but later agreed. I was also added to the group. Half of my batch mates are abroad and the rest are in India. Somethings never change and so do some people. In spite of Facebook and Linkedin being available, we have lost touch with each other. We are friends on Facebook but still don't talk to each other. We wish each other a happy birthday or occasionally like a post shared by someone on Facebook. Guess we are too busy in our lives now.

Coming back to the topic, I may have been added to the group but I choose to remain silent. I don't want to have any conversation on the forum. My college mates have remained the same. In the past during my travels in India when I met some of them,  they have had nothing but criticism for me. Why? Well, because I changed my career path and I am still single, unmarried and don't have any children. During college times I used to have this NORTH INDIAN group that stuck together and was judgmental about others. They just gossiped all the time. I being myself used to live a solo life and enjoyed my own company. This meant eating alone, watching movies alone and spending time reading good books and magazines. I was not liked just because I was not a part of their group. 

The situation has not changed. They still remain judgmental and I don't care. Some of them want show off on the strides they have made and how much they have gone ahead in life. I guess we all have our own journey and paths to lead and they cannot be compared. I am happy with my life.

I am living the MGTOW life and have the independence and mental peace that my married batch mates may or may not have. In my 30's, I am travelling, doing solo backpacking across India, have started by baby steps as a biker. I am also planning to take up body sculpting and long distance running to build up strength and stamina. 

These people may call me a a loner like they always did but I call it freedom. I chose quality of life over quantity. My bucket list is different from others and I don't want to compare.

In post COVID times, I have decided to socially distance myself of negative and toxic people and choose not to interact with them anymore.

The group will be active for a few days, maybe a month or two. The moment normal life resumes, people will stop interacting aand this group will become inactive and dormant like rest of the groups that are on our whatspp application. 

Bhaveen Sheth

INDIAN MGTOW

When Parents destroy theirs sons lives in the name of marriage-Bhaveen Sheth-DOTSIM-Indian MGTOW

Who says that only women are forced into marriages? Indian men face the same problem, It is just that they don't make a hue and cry over it.

Countless lives of Indian men have been destroyed by wrong and toxic marriages. Men have suffered emotional breakdown to the extent that some of them  committed suicide. Many lost professional opportunities and others just became nervous wrecks. In my interactions with many male rights activists who had gone through difficult marriages and are now divorced or separated, I realized that in most of the cases the parents wanted their sons to marry, even after a terrible divorce the parents once again want their sons to get remarried.

Guess some people never learn their lessons.

The mentality of Indian parents is different. They treat their sons like some kind of personal property or a golden goose that needs to be cashed upon when time is right. Indian men struggle hard sacrificing their teen years and burning the midnight oil in order to get good grades followed by admission in good colleges and later campus placements or a job in a good organization. Some even end up getting a good salary package. Just a year in the job and the parents are after the son to get him married. Most of the parents are proud of their sons achievements, nothing wrong with that, however they problem starts when it becomes a part of their ego. The son has not even settled well into his work and the talk of marriage starts. Biodatas, horroscopes and photographs are exchanged and the ground work for matrimony starts. This is followed by visits to the prospective brides house and gradually the meetings take place.

There are times when I feel that the parents are in a hurry to get their sons married. I fail to understand why? This is especially in the case where the sons are highly successful, you know, the IAS-IPS-Government Services-IIT-IIM-Engineering-MBA-B-SchoolPassouts-Doctors-Computer Specialists, all earning good salary packages along with perks and benefits. These folks are looked upon as winners or super successful people.

Of course the marriage takes place and the bride is a good looking beautiful dame that even the husband's best friend would get jealous of. The engagement and marriage takes place followed by a mind blowing honeymoon. Then a different life starts and it is called a married life and this is where the reality sets in. I don't know what goes wrong but the marriages comes to an abrupt end. This is followed by divorce in courts and visits to the police stations where false allegations are filed by the bride and her parents. Many men can't take it and they end up committing suicide. Go to any of the websites or blogs dedicated to Indian men's rights and read the stories where the husbands committed suicide. You will observe a similarity: The men were well educated successful professionals.

This write up in not about why successful men commit suicide or why does an arranged marriage fixed by two families end up into a disaster. This is about the parents of the men who somehow force their sons into such marriages just because they want to fulfill their dreams and expectations, just because they want to show others about the fanfare related to the marriage ceremony or in many cases ask for a huge dowry, mind you, this is not in all the cases but yes money does exchange hands in such kind of marriages. Problem is that most of the Indian parents want to live their lives through their children. This makes them extremely dominant and controlling. They don't want to give a free hand to their sons so that they can take their own independent decision.

Have you ever met the parents of such super successful men? The false pride and ego they carry can offend anyone. They leave no stone unturned in putting down those who are not as successful as their sons. They get delusional that their sons are special and above the rest. It is this thinking that leads them on the path of destruction. Just because their son is successful, they are entitled to a privileged treatment and expect the best. They feel that their son deserves the most beautiful girl available who is also educated and will play the role of a typical housewife and daughter in law. In order to cash in on the success of their son, they even expect a hug dowry or a royal wedding just to show off in front of their friends and relatives.

Unfortunately they are not prepared to see the destruction when the marriage goes sour. Rarely are such marriages resolved amicable. Huge alimony is paid to settle the divorce, not to forget countless visits to police stations and courts. The son ends up becoming the victim of his parents decision taken due to ego, greed and false pride.

I wish these parents were more in touch with reality, I wish these parents could make a visit to the family courts in their cities and towns to have first hand experience on what divorce proceedings look like, I wish these parents read newspapers and magazines in order to realize the problems faced by the modern Indian men. I just wish that these parents stop watching those daily television soaps that portray some ideal wife or daughter in law which is certainly not the reality. I wish they stop thinking that bad things won't happen to us, i wish they stop living in a fantasy Utopian world. I wish they understand the reality.

It is the son who ends up paying a huge price for his parent's wrong decision, sometimes at the cost of his own life. All I can say is that parents should given their son's more time so that they can explore what is right for them, let them travel, meet other people, explore the world or even India. This matter a lot. Experiences shape your personality and you realize what you want. You become more confident and less insecure.

This post may not be relevant to veteran MGTOWs. However all other single Indian men who are reading this post, it is my sincere request that you focus on your work and career. Meet new people, travel across India and have a diverse experience. Don' t fall into the emotional blackmail of your parents to get married. Marriages created in the basis of materialism, property ownership, CTC, salary, designation, offshore postings don't last for long. What matters is how you get along with a person emotionally and how much you relate with each other.

Take your desicion wisely.

Bhaveen Sheth

INDIAN MGTOW

Happily married only on social media and during social functions: Bhaveen Sheth-Indian MGTOW

Indian society is strange and the married people are equally strange or I would say amusing.If an Oscar award was to be given the world's best married couple, I am sure married an Indian couple would win this award.The show that they put up in front of the outside world is amazing.

Today's married couples love to brag and boast to the whole world about their so called happy married life.Social media has become a platform for showing off. I fail to understand why you have to show your happily married status to the whole world? Relationships are showcased the moment one gets engaged, later you get to see the pictures of marriage followed by honeymoon pictures from exotic places. And Man!!!! These pictures are so romantic, even a hardened ideological red pill MGTOW will feel like getting married. Unfortunately reality is different from fantasy and within 2 years of a marriage the couple starts experiencing  what married life actually is. Couple who are happily married will never showcase their relationship status to the whole world. Marriage is a minefield and one needs to tread the path carefully.

In today's scenario, majority of the married couples are not happy with their married lives.Everyone has their own reasons to be unhappy. Unfortunately we as a nation of hypocrite people known for heir dubious double standards will portray a different picture in front of the world.

Be it facebook, instagram or whatapp status update, a portrait of a happy family is always displayed. Marriage anniversaries and birthdays are showcased as if the married couple are madly in love with each other.At social functions the married couple puts up an act and is seen to be happily married with wonderful children. Some single Indian folks find them as a source of inspiration and think of getting married.

However the veteran single Indian man aka Indian MGTOW knows it all. Beyond that glitz and glamour, beyond those fake smiles and hugs, beyond that superficial love and affection there lies a dark underbelly of discontent, resentment, frustration, hate, anger, prejudice and discontent. A show is put up by the married couple in order to hide the reality.

This is the truth about our society and reality of our times.

Bhaveen Sheth

INDIAN MGTOW

I write for Single Indian Men and Indian MGTOWs: Bhaveen Sheth INDIAN MGTOW

There are times when my articles are vehemently criticized by a section of the society. My critics find my writings to be poisonous and full of hatred towards the married folks, women and society in general. I am also told that I am ranting out my own frustrations on my blog. Seriously!!!! So now speaking in behalf of Indian men, their rights and problems is considered as frustration. I am amazed at the hypocrisy of some people.

Since the last two decades we have been reading on feminism, women's rights, patriarchy, toxic masculinity, stupid and dumb Indian men, single mothers etc etc. Be it the print media, social media or blogs, everywhere you can find it. However there is hardly any forum for single men, divorcees or separated husbands or single fathers. I believe in giving a voice to this section of the Indian male community.

Speaking for men's rights in not a crime. The last two decades have witnessed the rise of third and fourth wave militant feminism and feminazism. It is the men who are at the receiving end. Marriages are breaking up due to minor problems, entitled women are not willing to adjust, false cases against the Indian husbands and their parents are on a rise and most important many Indian men are not able to get married due to the rising demands and expectations of the women.

Many Indian men are sourcing the Internet on how an Indian man live a peaceful solo life, a life without criticism. A decade ago the media would write long articles dedicated to single Indian women and how they should life a happy solo life but what about Indian men? Can't they too live a happy life by not getting married?

There is so much shame and stigma associated with single Indian men. The society does not consider them as normal. They face jabs, ridicule and insults for no reason.

There has to be a platform for single Indian men who are looking for a meaning in their lives, a space where single men can find validation, a source where they can find like minded people and realize that their decision to stay single and take up the MGTOW lifestyle was not wrong.

Single men require validation and where will they find it? The married folks offer no solace, the society in general has no space for them.

I write so that single Indian men and MGTOW's realize that they are not alone, that there is a manosphere in India filled with like minded Indian men. Unfortunately some sections of the society consider my writings to be misogynist and patriarchal, that they are to harsh towards the female gender. I can't given possible explanations to everyone.

The problem is that our society is filled by beta simps, white knight social justice warriors or useful idiots who don't want to accept or listen to the other side of the story. No one realizes or understands the problems of Indian men. No one wants to acknowledge our pain and suffering.

There will always be critics and detractors and I give an damn. I will continue to write for my fellow single Indian men and MGTOW's.

There is a serious need to spread the awareness about the MGTOW lifestyle in India and help single Indian men follow its path.

MGTOW for Life.

Bhaveen Sheth